Yesterday was amazing, like one of those vacation days when the weather is perfect and the scenery and activities match it. After some treatment, we experienced a day with all aches and pains gone and God gave us a hint to how they are part of His plan. Our trials by pain became a reason to change some travel plans — and by doing that, we can be helpful to someone later, at least it seemed that way yesterday, but today is a different story.
The pain and trial returned. My husband’s day of relief is over and both of us are suffering as before. I feel heavy and look to Jesus to help me function as daily responsibilities cannot always be ignored. At the same time, I cannot ignore God’s Word nor the significance of today’s devotional reading. To put it into my words, it reminds me that being transformed into the image of Christ is about both faith and obedience. It is surrender and trust on my part, putting myself (and my family) into His hands. He is the potter and we are the clay. My part includes dealing with sinful, selfishness:
Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth… (2 Timothy 2:21–25)God does the shaping like a potter shapes clay. A lump of clay could never grow into a beautiful vessel if it stayed in the clay pit, but when it is put in the hands of a skillful potter it grows rapidly under his fashioning into the vessel he intends it to be. And in the same way the soul, abandoned to the working of the heavenly Potter, is made into a vessel of honor, sanctified and fit for the Master’s use. I need to cooperate with my Master — first by trusting Him and second by expecting Him to do His work.
The obedience is made easier when I can see some progress, yet discouragement and impatience are not the progress He is looking for. As today’s devotional says, if I have taken the step of faith by which I have put myself absolutely into His hands, I must now expect Him to begin to work. And here is the rub: His way of accomplishing that which I have entrusted to Him may be different from my way. In particular, I may not see what He is doing, but He knows best and I must be satisfied.
Last night I went to sleep expecting the trial of pain to be over now that we could see a (possible) purpose for it. I was happy about that, but the pain returned this morning. Why? I’ve no idea. Is this a test of my trust — that it is truly trust in Him that His will is best? Or was I just glad that it made sense, at least for a day?
PRAY: Lord, I feel a bit like Jacob when he wrestled with You. I want to know the what, why, when of things and You want me to simply trust You, no matter what, why, and when, meaning all the time, no matter what, and believing that the why is because You want the best — that I be like You — even when in the trials. You are waiting for a genuine “Not my will but thine be done.” And I am so slow to learn.
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