Unanswered prayer? One reason . . .

People do not always agree and get along. I read and watch mysteries and even though most are fiction, they are based on this reality. Someone wants something they cannot have so they harm others trying to get it. Mostly, that thing they cannot have is a selfish desire. For this, God says:

What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. (James 4:1–4)

The root of the problem is selfishness, another word for sinfulness. The object of desire could be legitimate but in this description the reason for wanting it is all about me, me, me. As a Christian, all I have to do is ask God for those things that I need, even the things that I want, but if my motivation is to bless myself or glorify myself, or make me the star, then the prayer will not be answered. I have made my wants and my stuff more important than listening to and obeying God.

It happens. I’m too embarrassed to name some of what I’ve asked for wrongly and God said no. I’m ashamed of the emotions that rose up because I didn’t get what I wanted and the arguments I’ve been in for the same reason. Yet if it were not for those experiences, I’d not know the reality of a couple of big reasons that God does not answer prayer.

One is that I do not ask. I assume I can get it for myself, perhaps knowing in my heart that it is the wrong thing to ask for anyway.

The other is that I ask but with that selfish motivation that this thing is for me, to satisfy me, to make me the winner, to do for me what I should not want but am asking anyway.

There are lessons learned from being selfish. While God often shields my foolishness from the public eye, just knowing that others see how I’m thinking and acting is awful. Worse yet, knowing I’m putting myself above the care and wisdom of God is humbling. For this, I should be thankful. The alternative, a hard heart, would make the next few verses meaningless . . .

But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. (James 4:6–10)

From being so selfish and from realizing God becomes deaf to my selfish prayers makes me realize my pride and the way the devil manipulates my thinking. It also makes me realize that this passage has a logical sequence. It is summarized at the beginning: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” This is well described in the next lines.

Submit to God comes first. There is no power to resist Satan or my own selfishness while I try to hang on to it. I cannot serve Him while I am trying to serve me.

Resist the devil comes on the heels of submitting to God. Stop listening to the devil’s lies and destructive suggestions. If I am yielded to God, he must leave and he does. Sometimes it takes me a while to figure out what I’ve held back from God, but once that happens (and is confessed) the pressure is off. I win — by giving up!

The reset of it is easy. Mourning over sin is not fun, but in the end, God exalts me. That is always unexpected, even though I know this verse. God is utterly amazing!

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, there are times when I’ve prayed, “You are my Savior, save me” and You come to the rescue. However, there are times when I’ve prayed, “Give me . . . .” and asked for foolish and sinful things. I’m so glad that You are not like a genie in a bottle that grants every wish. You keep me from the silliness and sinfulness of myself. For that, I praise and thank You.

Today’s thankful list . . .

The Word of God that tells me how to live in victory.

The energy that comes with freedom from selfishness.

Ability to choose.

Finally being able to get my sister on the phone.

My personal trainer who refuses me the luxury of whining.

Being able to record rugby games in the middle of the night to watch the next day.

Crisp cold air with sunshine.

Salmon sandwiches on homemade bread.