We do not grieve as others do . . .

Genesis 32; Esther 8; Mark 3; Romans 3

How is it possible to have grief and joy at the same time? Could that be the same as Jacob’s experience of having faith and fear at the same time? He was traveling to his homeland and realized he would meet up with his brother Esau who had threatened his life years prior. He was afraid for his life and the lives of his family even though God promised to do good to him and give him many offspring:

And Jacob said, “O God of my father Abraham and God of my father Isaac, O Lord who said to me, ‘Return to your country and to your kindred, that I may do you good,’ I am not worthy of the least of all the deeds of steadfast love and all the faithfulness that you have shown to your servant, for with only my staff I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps. Please deliver me from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau, for I fear him, that he may come and attack me, the mothers with the children. But you said, ‘I will surely do you good, and make your offspring as the sand of the sea, which cannot be numbered for multitude.’ ” (Genesis 32:9–12)

This is the odd experience that people of faith often have. Life is given to us and we enjoy and believe the promises of God but at the same time, the curves that life throws often put us in an emotional place that God does not author. What is going on? Why the dual responses?

I’ve had nearly a month of these opposing ups and downs. One is sorrow, grief, fatigue and even anguish and denial of events. The other is joy, worship, energy and sharing the wonder of God with others. Can I say this is due to the spiritual life of walking with Christ compared to the fleshy life of letting my sinful self be in control? Part of it could be that for during the times of grief I am often thinking of my loss instead of my sister’s great gain. However, I also think of Jesus who is God in human flesh, human without sin, and realize that He felt some of these emotions that seem so negative, so untrusting.

I like what Jacob did about it. He rehearsed the promises of God. I’ve been doing that too. I have a folder on my computer with pictures that emblaze Bible verses and passages over landscapes and other scenes. This is my ‘slideshow’ and as it changes, the Lord continually reminds me of what He says He will do. Often my mood is lifted even though situations remains the same. It is not a ‘perfect life’ that gives joy but the words of the Lord that tell me what He is and how He cares.

Jacob went on to wrestle with God and in that found the assurance that he needed:

And Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket, and Jacob’s hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, “Let me go, for the day has broken.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” And he said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob.” Then he said, “Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with men, and have prevailed.” Then Jacob asked him, “Please tell me your name.” But he said, “Why is it that you ask my name?” And there he blessed him. So Jacob called the name of the place Peniel, saying, “For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life has been delivered.” (Genesis 32:24–30)

He still needed to face Esau, and the danger was still there, but he could now say he had been delivered.

My sister is still gone. The memorial service will still happen in a week. The sorrow of this loss will return from time to time. My hope and peace of mind cannot happen by her returning to this world — but it will come from Almighty God and the promises He makes. I know that she is with Him — to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. The ache is because she is gone from here and the joy is that she is fully present with Jesus.

I might wrestle at times, but if I say, “I will not let You go until You bless me,” then He does just that. Applying this is not as easy as saying it.

My attitudes can be my worst enemies . . .

Genesis 31; Esther 7; Mark 2; Romans 2

When my mother and father married, they made an extraordinary agreement; they agreed not to fight. They had their differences yet I never saw them argue over anything. This is an amazing legacy and even though I later struggled with how to handle conflict, God used their example to set a standard.

That said, the sinful human heart could be described as, “I want what I want when I want it” making fights and hostility a common problem. It is motivated by those sinful desires and shows up in every home, group, community, city and country in the world. It shows up in me too.

Genesis tells how Jacob got fed up by his father-in-law’s behavior. When God told him to go home to the land of his fathers, he was quite happy to quietly leave. Laban was not happy and the event was complicated by earthly, selfish interests, such as Rachel’s theft of the idols and Laban’s self-seeking animosity. This event later had great significance for Israel: God would deliver and protect Israel as He brought them back to the land from Egypt. Here Israel would see God’s victory over idols and idolaters, God’s use of dreams for deliverance and protection, and the boundary by which God would keep His people apart from her enemies. God can overcome our selfish and hostile plans.

In the conflict described in Esther’s story, Haman wanted power and sought revenge on Mordecai for not honoring him so he tricked the king into ordering the annihilation of the Jews. The king was angry at being hood-winked and what appeared to him as a physical attack against his queen. In this hostile situation, God’s grace kept an evil man from destroying his people, but it was a battle that began with a sinful power struggle.

Opposition to Jesus began early in His ministry. The Jewish religious leaders had their rites, customs and rules. Everything Jesus did flew in their faces. Had they acknowledged His deity and authority, they would have been glad to hear His clarification of how to please God, but they refused everything He did.

Now some of the scribes were sitting there, questioning in their hearts, “Why does this man speak like that? He is blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?” (Mark 2:6–7)

And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that he was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to his disciples, “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?” (Mark 2:16)

Now John’s disciples and the Pharisees were fasting. And people came and said to him, “Why do John’s disciples and the disciples of the Pharisees fast, but your disciples do not fast?” (Mark 2:18)

One Sabbath he was going through the grainfields, and as they made their way, his disciples began to pluck heads of grain. And the Pharisees were saying to him, “Look, why are they doing what is not lawful on the Sabbath?” (Mark 2:23–24)

To this day, the sinful rejection of God-given authority causes fights and conflict in families, the workplace, society and more. Everyone wants to be the boss. This is also seen in Romans where Paul describes it from the other side of the coin:

But if you call yourself a Jew and rely on the law and boast in God and know his will and approve what is excellent, because you are instructed from the law; and if you are sure that you yourself are a guide to the blind, a light to those who are in darkness, an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of children, having in the law the embodiment of knowledge and truth— you then who teach others, do you not teach yourself? While you preach against stealing, do you steal? You who say that one must not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who boast in the law dishonor God by breaking the law. For, as it is written, “The name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.” (Romans 2:17–24)

It is one thing to resist authority and another to demand being the authority, but both cause hostility. Thinking that I know everything and treating others as if they are foolish is certain to create conflict. Not only that, others will observe my behavior and belittle God because of it.

Apply this. Pay attention to my heart. How do I respond when resisted? How do I treat others who have ideas different from mine? Do I practice what I preach? Am I obeying God? Do I even know what it looks like when I want what I want? Obviously, the cure for conflict is obedience to God. These are the questions I must answer and obedience is what I must do.

Accusing or excusing?

Genesis 30; Esther 6; Mark 1; Romans 1

Today’s readings make interesting connections. In Genesis, Jacob came up with a scheme. For his wages, he asked his father-in-law for the odd colored sheep. Laban removed them all from his flocks and okayed the plan thinking Jacob would not find any of those in his herd. However . . .

Whenever the stronger of the flock were breeding, Jacob would lay the sticks in the troughs before the eyes of the flock, that they might breed among the sticks, but for the feebler of the flock he would not lay them there. So the feebler would be Laban’s, and the stronger Jacob’s. Thus the man increased greatly and had large flocks, female servants and male servants, and camels and donkeys. (Genesis 30:41–43)

Obviously looking at odd-colored sticks would not produce odd-colored lambs, but God’s had was in this result. He promised to bless Jacob and even though Laban tried to foil the plan and Jacob was a schemer and tried to gain by his own ingenuity and superstitions, God was in charge.

The same power of God shows up in Esther’s story. Haman had a plan too but God overrules the schemes of humans. He moves events and circumstances for His good pleasure. Haman’s pagan advisers and his pagan wife unknowingly affirmed that neither Haman nor any other human can possibly stand against God’s chosen people, the Jewish nation. Even though God’s people often disobeyed Him, even though they were often not spiritually or even physically where God wanted them to be, deliverance would come. God would so work in history that He would be vindicated and His people delivered.

God uses the schemes of these and other rebels for His purposes. Yet in all our disobedience and resistance to God we are accountable for our actions. This comes out in the first chapter of Romans.

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools. (Romans 1:18–22)

Sin has consequences. No matter how clever we think we are, God rules. In this description, God lets those who dishonor Him go their own way and suffer the consequences. Without going into the details, this verse describes one of the results of refusing to honor God:

For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature. (Romans 1:26)

Lately I’ve been concerned, even annoyed at the way some people talk about and consider these “dishonorable passions” between both genders to be the worst sin ever. I agree that this behavior is sin, but everyone sins. It seems self-righteous to consider the sin of others (sin that I don’t commit) gives me the right to look down my nose at them.

This morning, I noticed that this is not the only consequence for those whom God has given up because of their rejection of Him . . .

And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them. (Romans 1:28–32)

Not all of this is about sexual sin. Some of it is other behavior that many would consider disgusting and terribly wrong, like murder, deceit, maliciousness, hating God, inventing evil and heartlessness, yet a lot of people who would condemn these things are engaged in the other sin on this list, such as strife, gossip, slander, insolence, pride, disobedient to parents, faithlessness and ruthlessness. The current acceptance of the sin spoken of in verses 26-28 is no different than the current acceptance of the rest of the list. It shows up in church spats, gossip, haughtiness and even being ruthless in business.

Yes, God can use my foolish and sinful behavior but He isn’t pleased with my disobedience or any thoughts of it being okay. May He convict us deeply to be responsible and accountable to Him, without scheming against others and without judging that their sin is worse than mine.