My attitudes can be my worst enemies . . .

Genesis 31; Esther 7; Mark 2; Romans 2

When my mother and father married, they made an extraordinary agreement; they agreed not to fight. They had their differences yet I never saw them argue over anything. This is an amazing legacy and even though I later struggled with how to handle conflict, God used their example to set a standard.

That said, the sinful human heart could be described as, “I want what I want when I want it” making fights and hostility a common problem. It is motivated by those sinful desires and shows up in every home, group, community, city and country in the world. It shows up in me too.

Genesis tells how Jacob got fed up by his father-in-law’s behavior. When God told him to go home to the land of his fathers, he was quite happy to quietly leave. Laban was not happy and the event was complicated by earthly, selfish interests, such as Rachel’s theft of the idols and Laban’s self-seeking animosity. This event later had great significance for Israel: God would deliver and protect Israel as He brought them back to the land from Egypt. Here Israel would see God’s victory over idols and idolaters, God’s use of dreams for deliverance and protection, and the boundary by which God would keep His people apart from her enemies. God can overcome our selfish and hostile plans.

In the conflict described in Esther’s story, Haman wanted power and sought revenge on Mordecai for not honoring him so he tricked the king into ordering the annihilation of the Jews. The king was angry at being hood-winked and what appeared to him as a physical attack against his queen. In this hostile situation, God’s grace kept an evil man from destroying his people, but it was a battle that began with a sinful power struggle.

Opposition to Jesus began early in His ministry. The Jewish religious leaders had their rites, customs and rules. Everything Jesus did flew in their faces. Had they acknowledged His deity and authority, they would have been glad to hear His clarification of how to please God, but they refused everything He did.

Now some of the scribes were sitting there, questioning in their hearts, “Why does this man speak like that? He is blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?” (Mark 2:6–7)

And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that he was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to his disciples, “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?” (Mark 2:16)

Now John’s disciples and the Pharisees were fasting. And people came and said to him, “Why do John’s disciples and the disciples of the Pharisees fast, but your disciples do not fast?” (Mark 2:18)

One Sabbath he was going through the grainfields, and as they made their way, his disciples began to pluck heads of grain. And the Pharisees were saying to him, “Look, why are they doing what is not lawful on the Sabbath?” (Mark 2:23–24)

To this day, the sinful rejection of God-given authority causes fights and conflict in families, the workplace, society and more. Everyone wants to be the boss. This is also seen in Romans where Paul describes it from the other side of the coin:

But if you call yourself a Jew and rely on the law and boast in God and know his will and approve what is excellent, because you are instructed from the law; and if you are sure that you yourself are a guide to the blind, a light to those who are in darkness, an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of children, having in the law the embodiment of knowledge and truth— you then who teach others, do you not teach yourself? While you preach against stealing, do you steal? You who say that one must not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who boast in the law dishonor God by breaking the law. For, as it is written, “The name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.” (Romans 2:17–24)

It is one thing to resist authority and another to demand being the authority, but both cause hostility. Thinking that I know everything and treating others as if they are foolish is certain to create conflict. Not only that, others will observe my behavior and belittle God because of it.

Apply this. Pay attention to my heart. How do I respond when resisted? How do I treat others who have ideas different from mine? Do I practice what I preach? Am I obeying God? Do I even know what it looks like when I want what I want? Obviously, the cure for conflict is obedience to God. These are the questions I must answer and obedience is what I must do.