No Pretense

Last night’s dream was profound. In it, another person put together a massive truth that helped me understand many things that have happened in my life that at the time made little sense. It was an explanation of intimacy, connecting it to being open and transparent, a person without layers that hide who they are. Perhaps the dream was prompted by wallpaper on my computer yesterday with this verse:

. . . For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

In the dream, I heard that everyone seeks intimacy. If it is not present with parents, then the child seeks it with others, never finding it because most people project an image that is not who they really are and do it for fear they will be rejected. This desire to be fully known and also fully accepted is so strong that it drastically affects behavior and relationships.

Part of what I realized from this dream was how I am drawn to transparent people because of my own desire for intimacy. It cannot happen when I am layered up or other people cover their true selves with whatever they think is acceptable. While extremes get labeled as hypocrisy, even the ‘nicer’ labels ruin that closeness that all people desire.

We recently attended an NA meeting and were blessed with the sense of ‘no condemnation’ as those addicted or fighting addiction to narcotics told their stories. The love and closeness in that room was astonishing. It made me think of the opposite that I’ve seen in congregations who hear all the time  ‘unless you live right, you are not pleasing God’ and all the rules about living right. In those places, the sense of being loved and safe is missing. 

This does not mean that Jesus died while we were yet sinners, as the NT says, and simply leaves us that way. Like the Twelve-Step program of AA, NA and others like them, the goal is to be free from whatever enslaves us. That freedom is becoming a new person, and for that, God is enough. Self-effort does not cut it. Our efforts fall short. I need to think as the psalmist writes:

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah (Psalm 62:5–8)

PRAY: Oh Lord, forgive me for the times I’ve sought intimacy and called it something else, and for the times that I’ve look to my own devices or to other people to meet that need. You and You alone are able to satisfy the deepest desires of my heart — including the desire to be fully known and loved no matter what being fully known might uncover or reveal. This also is the heart of Christian fellowship. Help me to be transparent with others. It might shock some, or embarrass them, or drive them away, but at this time in my life, I’m realizing the opposite. Not only am I drawn to those without layers, but many seem to appreciate and are encouraged when I refuse to hide behind them. Enable me to be who I am — as You help me become more like You.

Seeing Jesus in His People

Becky Pippert, author of “Out of the Salt Shaker and into the World” said in a video: “When I try to be like Jesus, all people see is me, but when I am just myself, people say that they see Jesus in me.”

Think of it this way: Jesus lives in His people. If He were salt in a salt shaker, the only way He could be seen is if the shaker is completely transparent. Any kind of surface covering or coloring, or a change in the composition of the shaker, and the salt cannot be seen. Since most people adjust their persona supposedly to be accepted by those around them, they hide what they really are. If Jesus is in their lives, He becomes hidden too, maybe not completely, but nonetheless blurred.

Chambers points to the birds and flowers as illustrations of the same principle . . .

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, (Matthew 6:26–28)

Birds and flowers simply are; they exist without any sort of effort to be anything other than what they are. They never stress about their lives and make no self-conscious effort to be consistent and useful. They just allow their source of life to be their source of life.

I’m thinking of the Christians that have had the biggest impact on my spiritual life. Like Pippert, they are just themselves and usually unconscious of the way they convey Christ to others. In fact, they would likely deny that is happening. When they look in the mirror, they see a flawed person, so they put their focus on Jesus Christ and because of that, when I look in that same mirror, I see Jesus shining through their lack of pretense and their openness.

How does this happen? Chambers says to focus on God. Do not bother about being of use to others, but believe in Him, paying attention to the Source of life, and out of you will flow rivers of living water. Looking at myself and my weaknesses usually produces dismay, and I become self-centered and self-protective, but looking at Jesus produces radiant hope. I become like Him by seeing Him.

Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is. (1 John 3:2)

The people who influence me the most are those who let everyone see them as they are. This transparency may reveal some inner ugliness too, but in exposing that, we are more apt to confess it and have God forgive and cleanse it. Not only that, others will identify with those ugly parts. Revealed weakness draws us together and we are far more able to overcome the ‘uglies’ when others know about them, and can pray for us, giving encouragement and support.

But transparent people also reveal the Lord Jesus Christ who lives in them. There is a child-like quality in their simplicity, yet Jesus shines and I can see Him in them. Those are the people who shape my life.

Also, as Chambers says, if I want to be of use to God, transparency keeps me rightly related to Jesus Christ too. This is vital because He is then free to use me — unconsciously and in the daily stuff of life.