Waiting on the Lord

 

In seeking God’s guidance about something on my heart, my first concern is making sure the idea is from God and not selfish ambition on my part. Knowing the difference is important:

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13–18)

God keeps His promises and blesses me beyond my imagination. Yet at the same time, my priorities and trust need to be based on what He says, not on my grand ideas. I might want to do great things, but that might not be His choice for me. As David wrote, I need to have this attitude: 

O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me. (Psalm 131:1–2)

For a weaned child, the hunger is there as is the source to satisfy it, but the child is quiet, not grasping to satisfy self. I often have great ideas yet if they are not from a heart that is content to let God decide, then I’ve not yet been weaned from my selfish ambitions.

Today’s reading points out that David knew that God kept His promises but he also realized that some of His faithfulness depended on keeping his side of the covenant. God does not bless me if I am disobedient, or if I want to do something for my own glory. Piper points to this psalm of David to show my part in doing anything, even if the initial leading is from God. 

“To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in you I trust” Trust God and seek Him knowing He will protect me and “Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me” because He is my God and because for Him “I wait all the day long.” David recalls His mercy and love, His forgiveness  and goodness. He knows, “Good and upright is the Lord; therefore he instructs sinners in the way. He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble his way” and that all that happens “for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies. . . . who fear the Lord. . . . “ and that “the friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him” and whose “eyes are ever toward the Lord.” God will deliver and protect him because he “takes refuge in Him” and “waits for Him.” (Psalm 25)

David is certain of God’s promises and that He desires my faith. If I am walking in the flesh, His priority is to correct that. If my doubts come from that Liar, the accuser of God’s people, God knows that too and will protect me. My part is to wait on the Lord and keep my heart soft and trusting Him, not filled with ambitious ‘I wants’ that cloud my judgment, nor let all those fleshy excuses be a reason for not trusting Him or obeying any tall order that He might give me.

This psalm says He will pluck my feet out of the net, turn to me and be gracious to me, bring me out of my distresses, consider my affliction and my trouble, and forgive all my sins. Hw will also consider my foes, and the hatred of any enemies, guard my soul, and deliver me, let me not be put to shame, and redeem me out of all my troubles. Yet those blessings come only when I fulfill my part in His covenant, even though my salvation is secure because Jesus kept His part in saving me and dying for my sin.

PRAY: Lord, what can I say or do but wait on You to either send marching orders or inform me otherwise. In the meantime, I know what to do next — pray and listen and most of all, obey what You tell me what to do next… 

Thinking right in a messed up world…

Is positive thinking a choice? I can remember my dad reading a book about it and how a person could do whatever they were certain they could do, thinking positively about it. We argued. I said, “No matter how much I think I could become an opera singer, that would never happen.” I won. He had heard me singing.

When it comes to listening to sermons, I have to remember that any admonishments from the pulpit are not possible in my own strength. Sure, God could change my vocal chords and make diva out of me if He wanted to, but that is not my choice or ability to assume He will. Thinking positively is good but I’m not God. 

This is something like those who say things like, “So and so would be healed if she just had more faith.” This suggests that it isn’t God who works the answers and changes our lives. Instead, it is up to me to choose it, as if I run my own life.

However, a negative attitude can move toward a positive by allowing Jesus Christ in the equation. It may not change my circumstances, but the Holy Spirit can change how I think about things.

For instance, I woke up this morning after a dream about a relative who has dementia. His spouse is trying to fix it by correcting his memory if he says something contrary to her memory. The result is tension and conflict. I thought about this for a few minutes and started to weep. What can I do to make that better? The same thing that the wife can do — nothing. Self-effort for Christians is a frustrating waste of energy.

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:4–5)

Yet abiding in Christ means relying on Him as my source, definitely related to living the gospel. This means knowing I cannot do anything in my own strength or according to my wants or desires or even needs is important. Being helpless actually helps me turn to Him and rely on Him to fill me with His Spirit and do His will with His power. It is like this:

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him. (Colossians 2:6)
Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12–13)

I receive Christ by faith, knowing I could not redeem myself. He works in me so I will live the way He wants. He is my power and whatever I do apart from that is sin. The Bible says so.

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13–18)

The symptoms of not abiding can be obvious. Most of them scream “I am right” or “I know what I am doing” whereas the abiding person behaves far differently. The fruit born by one who is relying on Jesus is listed above and also here:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22–23)

If any of it is missing, then I’m not abiding and have some confessing to do, mostly lack of faith in Christ and foolish faith in myself.

PRAY: Jesus, when I choose me over You, the consequences are as certain as the opposite are true when I abide. You put my heart at peace and fill me with joy. These days, the world seems filled with joy-robbers, yet You say, “I have overcome the world.” I need to cling to that truth, both for family conflicts and far larger events in this sin-sick world. Fill me. I cannot even think right without You and without knowing how You think.

Oblivious to the obvious

Years ago someone asked, “If money, education, or any other circumstance was not an issue, what would you like to do with your life?” My selfish ambition gave what I thought was a noble response: “I would like to start a Bible school.” I later found out that several prominent schools had begun because of a woman, so that justified my ambition. At the time, I didn’t consider the will of God nor what changes my life needed to make that ambition happen.

Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came up to him with her sons, and kneeling before him she asked him for something. And he said to her, “What do you want?” She said to him, “Say that these two sons of mine are to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your kingdom.” Jesus answered, “You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am to drink?” They said to him, “We are able.” (Matthew 20:20–22)

These two boys didn’t realize it either, nor did their mother. It didn’t matter what they thought of themselves. The reality was that their present lives contradicted what they asked for and they seemed oblivious to the obvious, just as I was in the same state of oblivion about my ambition.

Eventually they figured it out, just as God opened my understanding to the difference between such ambition and the humility required — plus a great many other character qualities and learning experiences. Another Christian servant and a half-brother of Jesus wrote this:

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13–18)

Sometimes I feel the pull of selfish ambition just by wondering why God didn’t give me much in the arena of important work, or at least how I would define important. This passage always convicts me. The description “earthly, unspiritual, demonic” puts me in my place. God isn’t looking for people who want to set the world on fire, or make headlines, or even do outstanding things. He wants an entirely different list of accomplishments — none that can be obtained by my efforts.

First, some self-examination. How am I like James and John? How do my words, attitudes, and choices contradict the very gospel that I love and defend? Am I impatient with people? Do I talk unkindly about others? How could I lead an educational institution if I was not able to live up to the principles that would govern the curriculum? What would my staff do with my weak faith or my  rudeness, or insincerity, or my irritability with them or others?

PRAY: Jesus, You are my patient teacher. To lead others requires far more gifts and a deeper character than I have. I’m just grateful to be in your classroom, gifted with your righteousness, and secure because of Your grace. Each time I eat the bread and drink the cup, You remind me of Your death and that I am united to your life. You call me to your likeness and I’ve no right to be upset over anyone’s sin but my own. Keep working to make me less oblivious to my obvious need for your transforming grace and change all my ambitions to the most important one — that I will always listen to You and obey what You say.

All for Jesus means all…

Christian living is like a train. Facts about God and His will lead me, faith follows those facts and feelings are pulled by faith.

The Holy Spirit is the center of my spirit with intellect, emotions, and volition acting according to that core. This means I do not dump those three things but yield them to the Spirit. Then my actions follow coming out of what the Spirit is telling me rather than from what I want, or feel.  

However the Christian life is described, all parts should be listening to God and doing what He says, willingly, and with emotions and whatever brain power I have. Faith is telling me that the will of God is true, correct and factual in every way.

This mean that “not my will but thine be done” is not about giving up my will but yielding it to God’s will. It also means that…

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. (Proverbs 3:5–7)

…does not mean I give up using my brain, but that I yield my ideas and understanding to the engine that pulls the train. In other words, be aware of the lies about God that get presented to me by the world, the flesh, and that old liar, the devil. Instead, use my will to cooperate with God’s truth.

The people of God are not meant to become empty of will power, to be left poor, flabby, nerveless creatures who have no will, and are brainless and governed by our emotions. We are meant to rely on the will of God rather than our own sinfully misdirected will. My will needs to yield to and be obedient to God’s will.

The same is true for intellect and for those with a high IQ. Giving it over to the Lord is just as challenging as giving up our will or anything else that a person might rely on. This is why God says…

For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 1:26–31)

Just as the will must be yielded and determined to seek and obey the will of God, so must everything else, not just my thinking and feelings, but any strengths that I may have. There is no shame in weakness for it makes this obedience a little easier. So also do verses like these:

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13–18)

Paul gladly boasted in his weakness because the power of Christ was his strength. This is an important truth to learn and follow rather than wanting to be a big shot without Him.

PRAY: Lord Jesus, You are my strength, sometimes surprising me and yet realizing I cannot boast, only in You. Anything good comes from You, and I am so thankful that You persist in teaching me that my own strengths are useless unless they are totally yielded to You.

Warning: challenge ahead . . .

 

READ Proverbs 1-4

For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of his saints. Then you will understand righteousness and justice and equity, every good path; for wisdom will come into your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul; discretion will watch over you, understanding will guard you. (Proverbs 2:6–11)

When I am ‘tipped over’ by some sort of ‘I will do this myself’ thinking, the wisdom of God is beyond my grasp. It does not make sense to do what He wants me to do and in my thinking, my ‘I wants’ are better. This is ‘old nature’ thinking. Reading these chapters in Proverbs are like listening to a gentle voice talking me out of all that.

Wisdom comes from God. That alone is a rebuke to my selfishness. This NT passage gives a description of both kinds of ‘wisdom’ and the distinctions are pointed, a reminder of what is better:

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (James 3:13–18)

Back to Proverbs, the above passage says that sound wisdom is for those who are upright (not tipped over by fleshy thinking) and for those who walk in integrity. Integrity is being totally the same inside and out, not faking what goes on in my heart and nor denying inside me any foolish things I do on the outside. It is transparent honesty without hypocrisy. In other words, when I tip over, I must acknowledge it — which is the first step toward becoming right side up again. 1 John comes to mind:

If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:6–9)

Proverbs also says that God guards the paths of justice and watches over my way. Not only does He want me to walk justly, this suggests that if anyone treats me unjustly (and I respond by tipping over), He will take care of that — once He takes care of me and gets me back in a forgiven and cleansed upright state.

Getting mad or retaliating will not fix situations of being sinned against. When that happens, God wants me to have discretion. Discretion means to judge wisely and objectively, even having a purpose or a plan that deals with such things. While this could be shrewd or with sinful intent, the discretion that comes from God means having a plan that guards me against a fleshy reaction to something done against me.

This suggests thinking it through and figuring out how I’m going to react to unjust treatment. I cannot ‘fix’ those who do it, but discretion will watch over me and understanding will guard and deliver me from it. For that, God’s answer is Jesus and the gospel. When nailed to the cross, He said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34)

Even if they did know what they were doing, forgiveness is the door to a changed life and disciples of Jesus Christ hold the key; Jesus also said, “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.” (John 20:23) This suggests that if someone sins against me, they will not be forgiven by God until I forgive them. Really?

What is forgiveness? How did Jesus do it? He died for it. He chooses not hold sin against those who sin, including me. God tells me to forgive like I’ve been forgiven. If I will not do that, then whoever sinned against me may remain accountable to God for it — but I also will be held accountable for my lack of forgiveness making this a lose-lose situation. For that reason, discretion includes forgiveness — which might mean seventy times seven if the one sinning keeps doing it.

This strikes me that the only way that discretion can guard me is if, by God’s grace, I plan to bear a sin against me without react negatively. Like Jesus, I need to be able to say: Father, forgive them; they know not what they do, and keep on saying it even if they keep doing it.