Look at where I am going

Yesterday I heard a radio preacher say that whenever anyone sees the face of God, nothing else can make them afraid. David could face Goliath without fear for he had seen the face of God.

This morning, I read this from John Piper’s book, Future Grace: “When something drops into your life that seems to threaten your future, remember this: the first shockwaves of the bomb are not sin. The real danger is yielding to them. Giving in. Putting up no spiritual fight. And the root of that surrender is unbelief—a failure to fight for faith in future grace. A failure to cherish all that God promises to be for us in Jesus.”

In the past week, I’ve had a threat to my future. Thoughts jump around inside my head, thoughts of heart failure in various forms or becoming weak and too frail to function normally. I’m not ready for this. Even though I’m not filled with panic and feel more thoughtful than anxious, God seems to know that I need to hear from Him.. Today’s reading clearly speaks to me about the attitude He wants me to have.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:1–2)

The focus in the reading is on “despising the shame” which is, to me, a peculiar phrase. It means that Jesus gave no thought to, and even looked down on the idea of being put to death in a horrible manner. To Him, the future glory with its eternal joy was such a great reality that whatever happened to Him in this present world meant nothing. He could shrug it off and remain with great perseverance under the trial of dying.

Stories of martyred missionaries come to mind. In the past year, I’ve read at least a dozen of them. Some were tortured, beheaded, burned, yet in each story, these faithful Christians “despised the shame” of what was happening to them. Some died with praise to God on their lips.

I feel ashamed of my little faith. My situation is a mere (and even mild) threat compared to the incredible example of Jesus under a far more severe reality. Growing old and facing death for me is nothing like the way He suffered, nor can it be compared to the way those missionaries suffered, yet His attitude came out in their lives and sustained them in a marvelous way.

No one wants to suffer with prolonged illness or die before a “ripe old age” yet know this is not for me to determine. My “race is set before me” on a course that God decides; my part is to run it with endurance, with the vision of Jesus before me. Because of Him, I have the hope of great joy for all eternity and that hope can allow me to also despise the shame of whatever happens here. 

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Lord, I thought I had a good attitude before I read this, but You make me realize that I’ve only a small idea of what it means to “despise the shame” of running a race that I cannot control. I’m also not thinking about the joy set before me as much as I should. I know what it lies ahead at the end of my run, but my focus has not been like Your focus. I confess being weighted down with negative attitudes, sinful fears and eyes that are looking at all sorts of things beside You. Forgive me for letting these things rob me of the joy You have set before me and help me keep my eyes on You.

God’s strength in daily life

It’s been said that Christians should always have something in their lives that cannot be explained in any way other than God is at work. I’m trying to think of examples. Today’s devotional verses offer one:

And now the Lord says, he who formed me from the womb to be his servant, to bring Jacob back to him; and that Israel might be gathered to him— for I am honored in the eyes of the Lord, and my God has become my strength— he says: “It is too light a thing that you should be my servant to raise up the tribes of Jacob and to bring back the preserved of Israel; I will make you as a light for the nations, that my salvation may reach to the end of the earth.” (Isaiah 49:5–6)

God told Isaiah that restoring Israel was too easy for His servants. The bigger challenge was that they would be a light for the rest of the world, bringing salvation to the nations. For that, God must become their strength.

Modern day examples are a bit harder to find, at least in North America. The current mindset seems to be that God should deliver us from all discomfort and threat rather than make us stronger and more able to meet those challenges. We visited a church while on holidays that put their current prayer list in the bulletin. It was nearly one hundred percent requests that God cure health issues.

We know that God cares about wellness; Jesus cured many sick people. However, where is the prayer for increased grace to live with chronic pain or to be a testimony to those around us when we suffer? Perhaps it is “too light a thing” to be made well and God would rather “become our strength” and give us an awesome and Christlike bearing during illness, suffering and struggles?

During the past few weeks of this crazy heart rate and fluttering, I’ve been aware of a spiritual war. It has not concerned whether I am well or not, but whether I respond to all of this the way God wants me to respond. For one thing, He says,

Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life . . . . (Philippians 2:14–16)

No grumbling, not even when my health is threatened? That is beyond me. Without Christ, I cannot behave like that. It is too easy to feel sorry for myself.

The Bible also says,

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3–4)

This does not eliminate self-care, but when life is tough, God still wants me to consider others, not turn inward and become selfish. Again, this is not possible apart from Jesus. It is far too easy to think of me-only when I am well, never mind during any illness or health struggles.

Just these two examples show that people who have those “God at work” things happening in their life does not need to be moving mountains or performing spectacular miracles. All they need to do is stop grumbling and care about others, no matter what is going on in their own life. For many of us, those two responses alone can be explained only by the presence and power of God. 

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While my experience is far from his, I am thinking about Job, Lord, and Your dealings with him. The first part of that story reveals that all his trials happened as a spiritual test to prove that the faith You give can withstand anything. Like anyone else, Job wanted his sorrows to go away, but he realized that he was being refined and would eventually “come forth as gold.” I also realize that You have a refining process for me. It can and does include all manner of trials. As I experience them, I want them to go away, but I also want to eventually come forth as a light in the world — living like Jesus — because in these things You have become my strength.

Don't let Jesus walk by

Human attention-getting devices fascinate me. Little boys walk on handrails hoping little girls (or other boys) will applaud them. A child refuses to wear socks, obviously enjoying all efforts to convince her to do so. A man leaves a short message on an impersonal answering machine, but takes twenty minutes to say the same thing face-to-face, embellishing the story and enjoying the audience. Many entertainers say that they love being up front and the center of attention. This is part of our me-first, fallen nature.

What about Jesus? Many times He commanded attention, but did He do it for Himself? I don’t think so. Many times He drew away from the crowds, avoiding their attempts to enthrone Him. At least two times, He turned away from His own disciples, as if to avoid them.

And he saw that they were making headway painfully, for the wind was against them. And about the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. He meant to pass by them, but when they saw him walking on the sea they thought it was a ghost, and cried out, for they all saw him and were terrified. But immediately he spoke to them and said, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.” And he got into the boat with them, and the wind ceased. And they were utterly astounded. (Mark 6:48–51)

So they drew near to the village to which they were going. He acted as if he were going farther. (Luke 24:28)

In the first instance, the disciples were in a boat in a storm. Jesus came to them walking on water. Picture that. Their mouths must have gaped in astonishment, incredulous at such a sight. Some of them were seasoned fishermen, but they had never seen anything like this. The text says He would have walked right by them. Was He testing them? Playing games? Jesus never did anything without reason. Why would He just keep going when these men needed Him?

The second instance is after the resurrection. Two disciples were walking, unaware that He had risen from the dead. Jesus appeared alongside, but they didn’t recognize Him. He engaged them in conversation and explained the Scriptures and how the Christ should suffer before entering into His glory. Then He acted as if He was going to keep walking away from them, leaving them without telling them who He was. Why would He do that? Again, was He playing games? Did He have a reason for this behavior?

In my experiences with Jesus, He has shown Himself in extreme ways. On one hand, He answers prayer or does something astounding that makes my jaw drop. On the other, He is subtle and I don’t recognize Him right away. In both, He wants me to respond to His presence, either to bid Him come closer or to takes steps toward Him. In other words, He waits to see if I want more of Him — or if I will carry on life as usual.

Today’s devotional reading is much more blunt in expressing what He is doing. It says that Jesus comes to us by His Holy Spirit, speaks to us through the preaching of the Gospel, the Word of God, and various means of grace and the providential circumstances of life. After speaking, He makes as though He would go further and if we are open to what we have heard, we will pray, “Lord, abide with me.” However, if that voice makes no impression, then He passes on, as He has done thousands of times, leaving the heart at each time harder than before, and the ear more closed to the Spirit’s call.

When I read that, I had to ask myself why anyone would not respond to Jesus, why we would simply let Him pass by. Then I realized the biggest reason. To invite Him in means getting out of the spot light, leaving first place and giving Him the place He deserves. I cannot abide in Christ, nor He in me, and still be the center of attention. While He may stand in the shadows and applaud my spiritual successes (see yesterday’s post), He is still Lord of all. If I will not give Him that place, then He will pass by me and move on to those who will.

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Oh Jesus, abiding in You is an incredible privilege. That You abide in me is a great wonder. That You stay here, even when I grab attention for myself is a mercy. Yet I am no longer a child who does tricks and balancing acts to turn eyes on me. This is not what life in You is about. Instead of passing by, I deeply desire to see You in all of life’s circumstances, and invite You to stay. May I never be so busy or so self-centered that You feel as if you must keep walking. Abide with me, Lord Jesus, this day and always.

Sitting in the shadows

Cliché sayings can be true, but at least one of them depends on the attitude of the person involved. I’m thinking of this adage, “Behind every great man stands a great women.” The feminist movement has perhaps made this truism obsolete because most women’s idea of greatness is being out front, not standing in anyone’s shadow. Yet the idea is there; every great person needs the support of someone else.

As an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. With great delight I sat in his shadow, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. (Song of Solomon 2:3)

The Song of Solomon is a love story. Some wonder why it is in the Bible for there is little reference to the Lord and spirituality. Most say it is a celebration of the sexual relationship in marriage, as God intended. Some insist this is allegory of the love between Christ and His church.

As I read this verse, I think about what it is like to sit under the shadow of someone else, lover or not. First, it requires a great deal of admiration for that person. I have to be impressed with them and feel that they deserve the spotlight.

Second, this requires that I am willing to take a back seat, to let all the attention, praise, recognition, etc. go to the other person. I have to be not only humble, but willing to be humble. The verse uses the term “delighted” that someone else is in the spotlight. For some, this might be easy, but it has not been easy for me.

When I was small, I had a childhood disease that threatened my life. My parents thought I would die, so they pampered and spoiled me. I was always in the spotlight. I did well in school and succeeded in other things, seldom finding myself in someone else’s shadow. 

However, when I became a Christian, I began noticing that God filled me with pleasure when other Christians showed God’s grace in their lives. If another believer was growing in Christ, thankful, generous, loving, and fruitful in other ways, my heart rejoiced. It became a delight to be around spiritually successful people, even to sit under their shadow without feeling any desire to say, “Look at me too.”

Max Lucado, in his book The Applause of Heaven, describes the Christian’s entrance to eternity with a crowd greeting that one, applauding that he or she is finally home. The surprise is that at the back of the crowd, Jesus stands applauding also. He is the reason that anyone makes it to heaven. He is the star, the Beloved One who makes it possible, yet Lucado has Him standing in the shadows and allowing His child to be in the spotlight. It is merely a human interpretation, but I believe that Lucado has it right. Jesus is delighted when His children succeed. To those willing to receive it, He gives His delight to us, making us willing to sit in the shadow of others and be delighted at their success.

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Lord, I love this picture of You standing in the background and delighting in Your people when we do that which pleases You. Even though You are the reason we can do anything good, and even though we are nothing without You, You still allow us some limelight. I’m overwhelmed by Your humility and grace.

God offers Rest

Most children have the experience of planting a seed in a flower pot and watching it grow. Many cannot wait to see if the seed has sprouted so dig it up to check its progress. Most of the time, this ruins the seedling and presents a lesson about patience being a virtue.

Patience is also a virtue when it comes to serving God. Many times, God wants us to wait rather than do something. However, the idea of “Letting go and letting God” is often ridiculed as a pat answer to life’s problems, even an excuse to get out of responsibilities and not do anything. Yet I know myself and know the heart of most of us; we want to be involved in making things happen. Instead of waiting on the Lord for instruction or to see what He has planned, we will assume our will is perfect and if God doesn’t answer prayer and make it happen, we will go ahead and try to do something, anything, to make it happen.

Like a child, I’ve had to learn that obedience includes “be still” as well as “move on.” God’s plans are always perfect, but even if I know what they are, His timing is also perfect. If I get impatient and try to make things happen, I will not only ruin that perfection, but be disobedient.

Today’s Scripture reading has all sorts of interpretation. After a description of God working for six days of creation, then entering into rest, it talks about a rest for the people of God. Some think this means the eternal rest of heaven where we never work again. It could mean that, but it could also mean the rest that happens when I quit striving to make things happen and rest in the power of God to do what needs to be done.

For if Joshua had given them rest, God would not have spoken of another day later on. So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God, for whoever has entered God’s rest has also rested from his works as God did from his. Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. (Hebrews 4:8–11)

This rest also describes the rest of salvation — in that my own works cannot do it. Anyone who wants to know God must stop trying to earn their salvation and rest in the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross. All who believe in Jesus Christ know this is true. We are saved by grace through faith, not by our own efforts.

There is also a rest after salvation. It is choosing to say to my fleshy efforts, “stop fretting, pushing, trying to make things happen” and trust God. He has a plan and I don’t need to “help” Him make it happen. For instance, before my husband became a Christian, I did all sorts of things to convince him that he needed to trust God. It was only after I let go of all my schemes that the Lord worked in his life. The Lord brought him to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ without me. So these verses can refer to that rest from self-effort, a rest in what God can do.

Other examples come to mind. I’ve seen problems in some of the churches we have attended. My prideful heart thought that I could fix them, or that my ideas were the solution. God showed me that He had other plans, not that my ideas were terrible, but His are always better. I needed to rest from my own works (in the sense of those works of the flesh) and let God do what He wanted to do. Otherwise, I was disobeying Him.

For me, the bottom line is that God offers rest. Some think that being a Christian involves lots of hard work and stress. It can, but that isn’t what God has in mind. He offers a sweet trust in Him that ceases striving because I know and trust that He is taking care of everything that concerns me.

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Lord, these past few days have involved lots of physical rest. My heart rate is normal, and the fluid on my lungs is less today than yesterday. I am tired, but enjoying this rest and the time to think about Your will. Instead of my usual busyness, I’m rethinking what You want. While doing, doing, doing might seem as if I’m accomplishing more than what happens when I rest, Your ways are always contrary to mine. I’ve learned much in the past few weeks about walking by faith. Now You are teaching me what it means to cease all my labors (literally and fleshy) and find out more about resting in You.