I am known . . .

At a writer’s conference in Grand Rapids, MI, author Walter Wangerin Jr. described standing on a cliff in Alaska as an eagle flew near him. At that moment, the eagle turned and looked him straight in the eye. He described the sense of connection, almost as if the eagle knew him, and as our goose bumps rose, he went on to describe the importance of knowing that we are known, that someone knows and understands us, and that God who loves us also looks at us with the eye of an eagle.

I’ve had that same “I am known” experience reading Gabor Maté’s book, Scattered Minds and realizing that he was writing about me. He described things I’d never articulated or even understood until he put my inner life into words. I felt released, unburdened, and relieved to realize that someone knew about my mental struggles with attention deficit issues.

Yet God does this for me all the time, almost every day for every part of my life. When I read His Word, He speaks to me and tells me things about myself, many of which I would never otherwise know. The Bible describes itself as having this ability:

For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account. (Hebrews 4:12-13)

One of Job’s comforters, Elihu, knew this was true. He said, “For His eyes are on the ways of man, And He sees all his steps. There is no darkness nor shadow of death where the workers of iniquity may hide themselves” (Job 34:21-22).

The average person who does not know God through faith in Jesus Christ is unaware of this. They do not realize that God’s eyes see right through all pretense to examine every motive and desire. Because they don’t know about the eye of the Eagle, they assume that outward performance will suffice. That is, if they “live a good life” they will pass muster on judgment day. Worse, they go through life not knowing the God who understands them totally.

Christians know better. We know that God isn’t interested in what we do on the outside as much as He cares about the heart. In His mind, if a “good” deed is motivated by selfish interest, it is a bad deed. Yet more than that, we know that God knows us. This is a precious thing, and the reason why the psalmist wrote:

O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. You have hedged me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it. (Psalm 139:1-6)

This is also why Paul called himself the worst of sinners. On the outside, he may have looked like a good man, and he certainly appeared to be the finest example of a Christian after he met Jesus, yet he knew his own heart. God’s light had opened his eyes and he could see his own heart the way God saw it.

My devotional reading today says that when a Christian is so enlightened and carries this inner conviction that the eye of God reads every thought, then every inward twinge of pride and self-righteousness, every rebellion and discontent, all peevishness and fretfulness, all lust and wantonness. The eye of God not only reads and marks it all, but also condemns it all by His righteous law, and because He is so pure, hates and abhors it all.

Christians, above all people, know that we are sinners before God. We know that our sin is deeper and worse than anyone else can see or know. We are aware that even though others may have sinned more deeply and grossly regarding outward acts, no one could have sinned inwardly more disgustingly and continually than we have sinned. Because of this, we hate our sin as God hates it.

Job came to this conclusion too. At the end of his great trial, he met with God and his eyes were opened by the eye of the Eagle. He then said, “I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees You. Therefore I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes” (Job 42:5-6).

When God turns on His light, I can see Him, but I can also see myself. As bad as that often is, I prefer the Light and His eyes. I want to be known and I want Him to know me. I never want to be in darkness again.