Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

For years I have felt guilty about those NT commands to show hospitality. Today I discovered this is a false guilt for I had the wrong idea of what that word meant. To me, it was inviting people into my home for meals and even to stay overnight, etc. The people who were identified as gifted in hospitality always did this and for me, it seemed very difficult. So today I delved into the Greek and discovered this: 

The word hospitality comes from philoxenia, meaning "love of strangers," and involves welcoming all people without prejudice. While meals and a bed could be a way of showing it, this is more about an attitude that reflects the love of God toward people. But it is not just a feeling. In the NT, it includes practical acts of service such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick, and helping those in need. 

Not only that, this word is not a special gift for a few (good cooks with nice table settings?) but an obligation for all Christians that is done without expecting any payback. Instead it may involve personal cost of money, effort, time and talent. It is not mere entertainment or merely sharing a meal, but sharing the life of Christ with others, including the gospel. It is unconditional love, like God’s love, and again, it is often about strangers with needs like hunger, homelessness, illness, or being in prison. 

This is not just about being an extrovert either, such as those who draw strength and feel good about being with people and doing things for them. Hospitality is a selfless obedience, not done to make the doer feel good, but to show God's love in sacrificial ways. I am more of an introvert. So how does hospitality jibe with being an introvert, which often adds to my feeling of falling short? 

I researched that also and now understand how poor word definitions can produce false guilt. This is what I found out about introversion: It is about people who primarily draw energy from solitude and inner thoughts, and who feel drained after social interaction with large groups. It is not necessarily being shy or not liking people, but needing alone time to "recharge" after social events, which make me feel exhausted even though I enjoy them. I do like one-on-one interactions or small groups better than large crowds though. Yet even in small groups, many times I’d rather listen than talk. However, I am able to speak up when the Holy Spirit prompts me. I have very little fear of social judgment. but would often rather stay home than go to many events. 

All of this makes me think of this:

O Lord, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it. (Psalm 139:1–6)

PRAY: God, You created me as You desired that I would do what You want from me. Thank You for these thoughts today. While focusing on what You do is vital, so is self-awareness — as You see it. I get skewed by my own ignorance. However, truth revealed by You always sets me free and better equipped to live for Your glory.

Turn on the stove and turn off the phone . . .

 

READ 2 and 3 John

My mother was gifted in hospitality. Farm life often meant people dropping in at lunch time and she gladly fed them. She’s could cook a frozen roast on the top of the stove and it was always tender and tasty.

While today’s reading warns against false teaching, it also focuses on Christian hospitality. The original readers didn’t need to be told to practice it, but they did need to be warned about false teachers who used kindness to worm their way into their unsuspecting hearts, oblivious to the danger of deception. Mom was alert to people who seemed to be in need, but not their motivation for expressing it.

Even today, Christian congregations can be naïve about sneaky people attempting to sway their beliefs. In a previous church, a new couple gave generously and the wife invited other women to her home. When it was my turn, I listened without talking and eventually discovered their goal was to split the church. I told the pastor and don’t know what he did, but they never came back. Another former church warned its members that cult people were attending and looking for unsuspecting people they could indoctrinate. We needed to be aware of such destructive intentions.

In both these letters, readers are told to hold fast to truth, love and obedience, but realize that only agreement on sound doctrine yields meaningful fellowship. John wrote

I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father. And now I ask you, dear lady—not as though I were writing you a new commandment, but the one we have had from the beginning—that we love one another. And this is love — that we walk according to his commandments; this is the commandment, just as you have heard from the beginning, so that you should walk in it. For many deceivers have gone out into the world, those who do not confess the coming of Jesus Christ in the flesh. Such a one is the deceiver and the antichrist. (2 John 4–7)

While some might be tempted to invite these people into their homes with a desire to change their minds, John was not advising his readers to do that:

Everyone who goes on ahead and does not abide in the teaching of Christ, does not have God. Whoever abides in the teaching has both the Father and the Son. If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house or give him any greeting, for whoever greets him takes part in his wicked works. (9–11)

Third John applauds one Christian for living out the teachings of the apostles because he welcomed traveling missionaries into his home, but he condemned another church leader for refusing to help these godly teachers. Not only that, this contrary leader also slandered and opposed those who disagreed with him. While false teachers can bring division, so can pride. How many churches have divided because certain factions have decided they are right and everyone else is wrong!

We need to be loving, but not without discernment. Love in this context is showing hospitality:

Beloved, it is a faithful thing you do in all your efforts for these brothers, strangers as they are, who testified to your love before the church. You will do well to send them on their journey in a manner worthy of God. For they have gone out for the sake of the name, accepting nothing from the Gentiles. Therefore we ought to support people like these, that we may be fellow workers for the truth. (3 John 5–8)

God’s love also disciplines. Liken it to raising children. A girl in grade nine told me: “I envy you because your parents love you enough to tell you when you do wrong.” In John’s case, he had good reason to discipline a self-centered man who was not loving others:

I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church. (9–10)

John prayed too: “Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul. For I rejoiced greatly when the brothers came and testified to your truth, as indeed you are walking in the truth. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” (2–4)

I chuckled at the end of this letter. Today, it might read like this: “I had much to write to you, but I would rather not send a text or an email. I hope to see you soon, and we will talk face to face.” (13–14) In other words, love and hospitality are seldom conveyed well through technology. Instead, it is better to be with people to share God’s love — and put away my phone!

 

God’s love is not blind . . .

In fourteen short verses, John’s final letter says a few things to affirm my thoughts and yet also convict me. He writes to a church elder and his greeting makes an interesting connection:

Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul. For I rejoiced greatly when the brothers came and testified to your truth, as indeed you are walking in the truth. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. (3 John 2–4)

In almost every prayer meeting I’ve gone to and every prayer letter I receive, the health of someone is on the prayer list. In one church, their prayer letter was 8.5” x 11” in small print and every request was for someone who was sick! However, John connects wellness of soul to his prayers for good health. He hints that prayers for walking in the truth take priority because he knows that sickness can be God’s way of drawing a wayward soul closer to Him. John’s greatest joy is that Christians walk in truth. Good physical health takes second place to wellness of the soul.

His next words are about hospitality for Christians who are travelling, perhaps missionaries or those forced to move because of persecution. These people were trusting other Christians to take care if them and John wants his readers to pay attention to that expectation.

Beloved, it is a faithful thing you do in all your efforts for these brothers, strangers as they are, who testified to your love before the church. You will do well to send them on their journey in a manner worthy of God. For they have gone out for the sake of the name, accepting nothing from the Gentiles. Therefore we ought to support people like these, that we may be fellow workers for the truth. (3 John 5–8)

He also notes that some believers are not walking in the truth and have refused to support these traveling ‘fellow workers’ . . .

I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church. (3 John 9–10)

This man put his own desires first, did not accept the authority of those in leadership, and even spoke against those leaders. He not only refused to show hospitality but stopped those who did and tossed them out of the church!

While I am shocked at this radical disobedience, is it any different than mine? I can be lazy about inviting people into my home, excusing myself as too busy. I can be indifferent to requests for help in this area. I can also think that there are countless people in our large church who are more gifted in hospitality so let them do it. I might not be as antagonistic as Diotrephes but I can be just as self-indulgent with lots of excuses.

John ends with an exhortation to me: He says, “Beloved, do not imitate evil but imitate good. Whoever does good is from God; whoever does evil has not seen God.” (3 John 11)

My commentary takes a bigger picture of this situation by saying, “To avoid the dual dangers of false teaching and division within the church, believers should practice the dual virtues of love and discernment.” In the NT, loving others means wanting God’s best for them. If they are false teachers, love wants them to escape the lies they are following and walk in the truth. However, that requires discernment. I need to first recognize who is who. Some of those travelling and seeking a place to eat and stay could fall into that category. If they do, then I need discernment to know the best course of action. Will loving hospitality help change their false views? Or am I best to say no as John told his readers in his first letter? Also, will my actions bring unity in the Body of Christ or will it cause division?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, I do confess my lack of interest at times in being hospitable. You know all my excuses and You know how to deal with them also. Help me be alert to genuine needs in the lives of genuine Christians who cross my path. Also help me be alert to false teachers, knowing whether I can help set them free from their error or should I avoid them? Would supporting them cause them to assume I am supporting their teaching? I want to be both loving and discerning and need Your grace for that and for everything else.

Today’s thankful list . . .

- God gives me lots to think about and do — every day!

- an enjoyable workout at the gym and sore muscles to go with it.

- a safe place to live and work.

- trying new recipes and being pleasantly surprised at the results . . .

- such as stew made from sweet potatoes, oranges, apples, onions, garlic, diced tomatoes and other surprising ingredients.