Learning and relearning . . .

Yesterday I debated with God about what is happening in my body, according to what one doctor says. I don’t want to be seriously ill. This crazy a-fib is enough, but maybe the Lord has other tests of faith for me? Anyway, it was a day of stress. I tried to be willing to submit to His lordship and soon realized that unless His Spirit is filling me, I cannot do that. I felt like a bug held down with a pin.

To add to my angst, God was not saying anything. However, this morning He speaks loud and clear . . .

“. . . Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18–20)

Months ago, He said the same words regarding my heart and it blessed me. I even repeated them to concerned people who asked how I felt. This is God’s body and He can do with it as He pleases. I meant it. Now He is checking my faith again and for a day I totally flunked the test.

Tozer says God works out the details of our Christian experience according to the individual temperament and distinct characteristics He has given us. Some people will hear and understand His wishes and focus on them. I am not one of those people, as least the focus part. My scattered brain is all over the map. I’ve excused that as ‘just the way I am’ but He is not interested in leaving me like that. This week I heard one Christian say that popping here and there doing a little of this and a little of that winds up with little accomplished. He seemed to be talking to me.

On the same vein, Paul says:

“Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead.” (Philippians 3:13)

He had one goal: “One thing I do” and this focus made him a significant person in the hands of God. I’ll never be in his category but am convicted by his words “one thing I do” even if he meant ‘one thing at a time.’

Yesterday, a radio preacher said much the same thing with more focus on motivation. He said that human need is vast but he cannot choose what he does on that basis; otherwise he would be going in circles. Instead, he learned to ask God daily for his marching orders.

I agree. Trying to select which human needs I can minister to leaves me worn out and confused, eventually doing not much. Far better to focus on the one thing God wants for that day, even that moment.

All this said, yesterday’s struggle showed me that my focus too easily turns from the ‘lesson of the day’ to my to-do list, or a long list of prayer regarding human need, or a bunch of I-wants. I do not think long enough about the lessons God is patiently teaching me. They are to be learned, but also remembered and done.

This means I need to deeply learn that I belong to Him, remember it, and act like it. If I forget, then the next pop quiz will throw me into a panic.

^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, You are incredibly patient with me. I forget too easily and need to meditate more on what You say to me, not happily dash off to the next thing — falsely assuming that because I heard You, I ‘got’ it.

I need to leave this pity-party . . .

Boasting of good health for many years makes a poor patient. Two things are on my whine list: my left eye that hasn’t fully recovered from the trauma of cataract surgery, and my heart. It enlarged when I was a child with rheumatic fever, became closer to normal but with a slight murmur due to a leaky mitral valve, and has now enlarged again resulting in an arrhythmia that is no fun at all.

The eye means blurry vision and even hurts sometimes. My specialist will examine it again today. The heart means energy when it beats faster, fatigue when it drops lower, and confusion when it does its slow/fast dance. I need way more sleep yet am getting way more done. Vitals are good, but I know this cannot go on forever.

Tozer hits my struggles at an angle that most people do not think about. First, he offers one of my favorite Bible passages:

“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness were through the law, then Christ died for no purpose.” (Galatians 2:20–21)

Then Tozer asks what this means to an individual? How can this theology be translated into life? Of course, the answer is the Gospel. Life happens to those who repent of their sin and believe in Jesus Christ.

But there is more. That person not only must forsake sin but go on to forsake himself, or in this case, herself. I cannot cover anything, defend or excuse anything. I cannot make bargains with God. I can only bow before Him acknowledging that because of sin, I am worthy to die. In doing this and in trusting the Lord Jesus Christ, I have life and cleansing and power.

This happens at salvation, yet the lessons take a lifetime to learn. The situations of life, including ornery eyes and a wayward heart test whether all of me is yielded to God. Can He have my eyes? Are they not His already? Can He have my heart? Didn’t I give it to Him more than forty-five years ago?

It is far easier to trust God when life is easy and everything works. I’ve had trials and He has brought me through them. Now He is trying my faith very up-close and personal and what do I do? Whining isn’t working. Bargaining isn’t either. I must declare, and totally mean it, that these eyes and this heart belongs to Him — to do with as He pleases.

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26)

Tozer says that the cross that ended the earthly life of Jesus also puts an end to sinners, that means an end to our self-rule. And the power that raised Christ from the dead now raises sinners to new life with Christ. He adds that there will be nothing in heaven that does not have the mark of the cross upon it.

^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, I know this is true just as I know I was crucified with You and You live in me. Everything has changed because of You. Grant me the grace needed to sail above this trial just as You have done with all of those that came before. May I trust You with my body health just as I trust You with the health of my soul and spirit. One day I will join You in eternity in a perfect body. I need Your blessing to carry on for now in this one!

Sugar and Self-control

Before our weekly group Bible study begins, dessert and coffee are served. My heart races with caffeine so no coffee. My body gets round with too much food so no dessert. The person who brings the sweets seems offended. One person told me I made them feel guilty for not eating dessert.

A few weeks ago, God used this verse to speak to me about food:

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, just as I try to please everyone in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved. (1 Corinthians 10:31–33)

Chambers calls this business of eating and drinking the “shallow concerns of life” and to beware of thinking such things are not ordained of God because they are. While he warns against being a spiritual prig that tries to impress others by not being shallow, the context of these verses has more depth. It is about offending people by refusing to eat anything that had been offered to idols, and when a Christian actually should refuse such food. The verses before it say:

If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience. But if someone says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then do not eat it, for the sake of the one who informed you, and for the sake of conscience— I do not mean your conscience, but his. For why should my liberty be determined by someone else’s conscience? If I partake with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of that for which I give thanks? (1 Corinthians 10:27–30)

The command to eat and drink to the glory of God is first about respect for the conscience of others. If the food is offered by unbelievers, eat it without questioning its source. If they tell you it has been offered to idols, don’t eat it. It isn’t that God forbids it, but those who eat will be acting against the conscience of their host — a person who thinks they should not eat it.

For me, eating and drinking are not ‘shallow concerns of life’ but important also to my health. It seems to me that putting too much focus on them can be just as problematic as considering it nothing to have two pieces of pie a day. I want to serve the Lord and glorify Him. Being a care-less glutton does not do that, nor does being a picky person who refuses things out of pickiness.

However, the word God spoke to me using these verses and others that were not about drinking and eating, but that my body belongs to Him. I am a temple of the Holy Spirit and I’m to think that way concerning both food and beverage. That is, stuff that is known to be harmful does not belong in God’s temple. Just as Jesus tossed out the money-changers, I’m to be willing to refrain if He says NO. Obviously He will tell me what to do, but it means listening carefully.

I’ve observed that over-indulgence is a slippery slope, one that is easily justified, but difficult to get off. I’ve also observed that self-control is a fruit of the Spirit so if it is not present when the goodies are passed out (and when I am already full from eating supper), then the Spirit is not in charge of this temple. If He has not filled me, I will be a useless participant in the Bible study and prayer or whatever else might come next.

Eating and drinking to satisfy me is contrary to doing either one ‘to the glory of God.’ Also I’d rather be a conviction to others for saying ‘no thanks’ than set a bad example by giving in to that continual temptation of self indulgence.