A few steps closer

On my visit to the ER January 27, my hiccupping heart required electrical shock to get it beating normally. They put something into the IV on my arm that made me “feel sleepy” so I shut my eyes, then opened them. The procedure was done!

When describing this to a friend, she said, “That is what it will be like when we die, you know.” I think she could be right. We close our eyes in this place and open them in the presence of Jesus. 

Today’s devotional reading is about this walk with God from life here to life in eternity. It takes thoughts from two verses about Abraham. In the first, Abraham began by obeying the Lord. He left everything he knew and followed as the Lord led him.

Now the Lord said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. (Genesis 12:1)

The next verse describes the end of his life. This man of faith was taken to his real home and his real kindred.

Abraham breathed his last and died in a good old age, an old man and full of years, and was gathered to his people. (Genesis 25:8)

The devotional reading is from Alexander Maclaren’s lovely words about life here and life there. He reminds me that each believer is called away from this world to a new citizenship. With that comes a vague or even a sharp sense of isolation. However, that will be over when we get to our real home. Here is what he said:

After all communion we dwell as upon islands, dotted over a great archipelago, each upon his little rock with the sea dashing between us; but the time comes when, if our hearts are set upon that great Lord whose presence makes us one, there shall be no more sea and all the isolated rocks shall be parts of a great continent.… If we cultivate that sense of detachment from the present and of having our true affinities in the unseen, if we dwell here as strangers because our citizenship is in heaven, then death will not drag us away from our associates nor hunt us into a lonely land, but will bring us where closer bonds shall knit the “sweet societies” together, and the sheep shall couch close by one another because all gathered round the one Shepherd. Then many a tie shall be re-woven, and the solitary wanderer meet again the dear ones whom he had “loved long since and lost awhile.”

These poignant thoughts touch me deeply today. I went to one of the finest heart hospitals in the world and had tests and an examination by a cardiologist. He told me that my childhood Rheumatic Fever left me with a leaky mitral valve, which I knew. It seemed well when tested a few years ago, but since then that leak has caused the atrium to be excessively enlarged, which is very likely the cause of my a-fib hiccups. This failure to properly pump the blood can be assisted with medications, but it cannot be fixed.

What does this mean? It means that my walk with Jesus Christ involves a reality --- this life is short, a mere blip on the time continuum. It means that I must cultivate that sense of detachment from this present world and firmly fix my affinity on the unseen. I have a promise from God that the Bible calls a future hope and home that has been guaranteed by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. It means also that my home-going will likely be heart related. 

This assessment was given to me 2-3 hours ago. At first, I felt shocked, but instead of those stages of grief (such as denial, anger and bargaining), I began thinking about two verses. One is an anchor that gives me comfort, a verse that I memorized years ago and have thought of often in the past month.

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26)

The second verse is about death, dying, and how people grieve. I learned this verse after my first experience at a Christian funeral. It was an amazing and joyful celebration. Yes, those left behind were sad “because we miss him” but so glad that “he is in a most marvelous place.”

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. (1 Thessalonians 4:13)

Christians grieve, but not the crying and wailing that go with an uncertain future. I am grieving that my health is not going to improve. I even feel tearful and sobered. I did not expect this. Yet there is an amazing inner peace, even joy. What is that? It can only be the Lord Jesus Christ who is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

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Oh Lord, I expected the doctor to suggest a procedure that would fix the erring electrical impulses. Last I knew, that leaky valve was so insignificant that the radiologist could hardly see the problem. This change in status is a surprise for me, but not for You. You gave me Psalm 73:26 long before the heart hiccups started. You gave me assurance of a heavenly home when You first came into my life. And today, You had a devotional in place to remind me that my true residence is not here, but with You and Your people in eternity. I don’t know what is next, but I’m certain of one thing: You have a path for my feet and will guide me each step of the way.

Making Plans, Receiving Guidance

About this time every year, I start thinking about plans for the year to come, but I’m not as ambitious as usual. Perhaps it is the fatigue that comes with “too many birthdays” as my father used to say. However, it might be that I’m finally learning that I do not have to make so many plans. Instead, I just need to follow Jesus.

Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12)

The Bible speaks much about the guidance of God. He begins by teaching His people the truth about spiritual realities, truth that can only be seen by those who have His Spirit and are reborn through saving faith. We rely on Him, praying as the psalmist prayed . . .

Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long. (Psalm 25:5)

The promise of God’s guidance is more than a dry list of rules and directions for life. With His direction, life is an adventure that takes me places I’d never otherwise go, yet always produces satisfaction and vitality.

The LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail. (Isaiah 58:11)

Not only that, the Holy Spirit is reliable and specific. He could bombard me with information that would overwhelm me with a terrible sense of my need and inadequacy, but this does not happen. Instead, He listens to the Father and tells me only that God wants me to know.

When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come. (John 16:13)

That is, when I read the Word of God each day, the Spirit of God speaks to my specific situation, giving me the truth I need for it. There is even a Greek word for this; it is “rhema” which is translated “word” yet means “a word spoken to meet the need of the moment.” This is why daily devotions are so vital. I put myself in a place where God can speak to me according to what I need to hear.

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness (2 Timothy 3:16)

Teaching, reproof, correction and training are the ways that God guides me. He shows me each day what will help me. Being guided into all truth is an enormous privilege. Without this, I would not know how faith in God applies to the daily situations and problems of life. I would not know how to respond to others who challenge my faith, or hurt me, or ask me questions. I would not know when I sin and need to confess my sin, or even when I’m in need of His help and guidance.

As God guides, He also indicates what is to come. I know that one day I will move from this life on earth to my eternal dwelling place with Him. For that, God makes another promise that uses the image of springs of water and His guidance.

They shall hunger no more, neither thirst anymore; the sun shall not strike them, nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb in the midst of the throne will be their shepherd, and he will guide them to springs of living water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes. (Revelation 7:16–17)

As I read this and try to imagine what it will be like, I can see how the guidance of God now is a mere taste of His eternal guidance — and someday I will experience the fullness of His refreshing.

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Jesus, You are the Living Word, the Water of life. Out of You flows all that I need for life here and for life eternal. I can make plans for today, and for the year ahead because  Your word says so. But it also tells me that I ought to keep in mind, “If the Lord wills, I will live and do this or that.” (James 4:15)

I’m grateful for Your will — it is perfect — and for Your guidance which is also perfect. Keep my feet on the right path, and help me to always remember that Proverbs 16:9 says I can plan my way, but You establish my steps!

Even if I go deaf . . .

“It must get easier to follow Christ as a person gets older.”

My mouth may have dropped open, but if not, my eyebrows went up.

He went on, “The older you get, the more you know how God wants you to live, so it gets easier.”

Of course he is young, at least younger than I am. I said something like, “You think?” when I really wanted to say, “You are not thinking.”

Logically speaking, if a person goes on in their education, the exams never get easier. If a person becomes a mountain climber, they are challenged by higher and higher peaks. Any endeavor builds skills, but there is always that aspect of going higher, working harder. The bar is constantly raised in everything from art to athletics.

Spiritually speaking, measure this idea by the life of Christ. His challenges began in the temple when a lad and questioned by the temple leaders. The challenges accelerated until that last one that unfolded in the Garden of Gethsemane. There, in anticipation of His final ‘exam’ for living in obedience to His heavenly Father, He sweat great drops of blood.

Every day that I determine to live for Jesus, I face temptations that are designed by my spiritual enemy to stop me. As God shows me how to conquer them, I’m hit with something more subtle, more ingenious. The Lord tells me to be careful, to “not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God” (Romans 6:13).

Each hour brings choices that require new instruction from God. if I were making them based on ‘rules’ that I have already learned, I would be violating a huge principle of Christian living. As the next verse says, “For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace.”

Law or rules are easy to learn. Mathematicians, scientists, almost every discipline of life requires learning and following the rules. Farmers know the “law of the land,” teachers set norms for the classroom, legislative bodies determine rules for society and law enforcement works to make sure we stick to those rules.

But Christian living is by grace, not rules. Grace is often defined as the mercy of God that forgives sinners who do not deserve forgiveness, but that is not the best definition. As I read the Bible, I can see that grace includes that, but it means far more. My favorite definition comes out of multiple passages: Grace is a personal revelation of Jesus Christ that has a profound affect on me, changing me to be more like Him.

Living by grace means seeing Jesus in a new, fresh way each day. It is a constant, on-going relationship where I seek and God reveals. It is looking at Him, learning more about Him, putting myself in places where God can show Him to me, and seeking Him where life puts me in places that I don’t enjoy and don’t want to be.

I’m not ancient, but I already know why some older people quit growing spiritually. Out of habit, they have learned the ‘rules’ of being a ‘good Christian’ and by the time their bodies start to ache, and they have gotten tired of routines. It becomes tiresome to bath every day and eat properly. It also becomes tiresome to remember and follow all those rules. Their focus turns so easily to the discomfort of aging and that zeal for Jesus begins to weaken.

I know this. It is another one of those temptations that youth know nothing about, one that requires me to “present myself to God as being alive from the dead” every day, even if I feel closer to dead than alive. Sometimes my body shouts at me, and if I listen to it, I will not hear or see Jesus, only my own crabbiness.

No, it does not get easier, but as I get older, fellowship with Jesus becomes closer, sweeter, more precious. The presence of the Lord buffers me from the little things like aching joints, a clock that seems to move faster, and a memory that plays tricks. It’s grace, His grace, that holds me near Him.

Lately, life has hit us with tests far greater than when I first started following Jesus. Then I knew nothing about CLL, heart attacks, demons in the house, an increasing sense of infirmity and aging, not being able to do what I used to do, plus a host of other stuff I cannot write here. These are new exams, and more difficult. Rules don’t work, and I can’t remember them anyway. The only thing that does work is the voice of Jesus whispering into my heart, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”