Becoming my best self?

Libraries and book stores have large sections of ‘self-help’ books, mostly about how to look out for me, how to make things happen, and how to be my very best self. After being a Christian for more than fifty years, and even after making many decisions to improve myself, I am totally aware that my best self is totally inadequate. 

Aside from sin (which the Bible defines as ‘going my own way’), living a self-directed life doesn’t work anyway. Most people struggle with their yearly resolutions, plus I have enough ADHD combined with a bit of autism to make focusing a challenge. I’m easily distracted, and no matter how hard I try, sticking to even a short to-do list is tough. I also crave simplicity and struggle with interruptions.

Piper says this about the biblical reality of being my best self:  

True selfhood flourishes in covenant faithfulness. By “true” I mean the self that has been created in Christ Jesus and is being transformed into his likeness. For example, Paul says in Colossians 3:9–10, “Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, and have put on the new self.” 

He refers this to keeping promises, making resolutions, and trying to stay on track. In myself, I cannot do it. In Christ and in the power of the Holy Spirit that governs that new nature, I can — but only then. My true self does not emerge or flourish in a life governed by self-gratification. It only flourishes when I have yielded to the Spirit and do what He tells me. This is true covenant keeping, a life under the guidance of God rather than life run by whatever strikes me as important.

Thinking about this today, I have several household chores, dozens of quilts either in progress or on my to-do list, plus a long list of undone stuff like hang a few pictures, purge the storage room, harvest more lettuce from my backyard planter, and go across the street for a few groceries. When I walk into my study, I see books unread and a host of other things on the go, or waiting to get to the start line. Add a touchy Achilles tendon that hampers walking and the desire to pray and exercise. Then there is that soup cooling on the counter that needs to be strained and put in the fridge, never mind the bathrooms need attention along with four loads of laundry. 

Sometimes I use a priority chart and after numbering chores, I just start at the top — and get the last one checked off — if nothing distracts me, like a phone call or a visit from a neighbor. The positive in all this is the realization that self-effort is useless. Without the Holy Spirit, I would sit in front of the TV, or read, or have a nap, or not do anything.

Is it only those with youthful energy and no attention-deficit issues that can live an orderly life without relying on God? I know age nor human inabilities are not the issue. It is always sin: “I want what I want” or “I will do it my way.” Trusting God and listening for His leading requires yielding to Him. Knowing and trusting His promises is vital. Otherwise, I’d stay in bed in the morning. I cannot live and prosper without Him. 

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. (Psalm 37:5)

From of old no one has heard or perceived by the ear, no eye has seen a God besides you, who acts for those who wait for him. (Isaiah 64:4)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. (Proverbs 3:5–6)

Piper writes about keeping our part of the covenant we have with God, yet I know this cannot be done in my own strength. Piper does too. He says:

God is exalted in our honesty when we look to him and not to our schemes. And when God is exalted in our lives, we discover what we were created to be. No pursuit of self-enhancement without this exaltation of God will succeed. But if we humble ourselves with confidence in God’s future grace, and by this faith submit to his command for promise-keeping integrity, then he will exalt us in due time: “For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” (Luke 18:14)

 PRAY: Jesus, You are most honored when I admit I cannot, and that I need You for all things. Long lists or short, hard days or easy ones, without Your promises, no matter how hard I try, I cannot improve myself. I need You. May You be glorified today and every day.