For instance, I am aware that sticking my finger in a
light socket could lead to pain or even death. Fearing that consequence, I
avoid putting my finger in light sockets. I’m not terrified of them (yet at one
point, I could have been, such as the day I found out this is a dangerous
activity). However, this fear governs what I do around danger.
Fear over consequences is part of living in safety and, in
most cases, this is a sensible fear. However, God warns His people about the
fear that keeps us from loving others. This is not sensible.
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. (1 John 4:18)
While fear usually begins as an emotion or feeling, the perfect
love of God is never mere emotion. It is a love (agape) that takes action for
the eternal well-being of others. This can be done with or without any feelings
of affection. It is the love that motivated God to love the world and send Jesus
to die for us. It is also the love that He tells His people to have for one
another. We even are told to give up our lives for others if their eternal
well-being depends on it. This love is from God, not possible in our own
selves.
Agape love never fears what might happen to me when I sacrifice
my own interests to show the love of God to someone else. It involves complete
confidence that God will take care of my needs as I give myself to the needs of
others. Agape love never worries about consequences or loss because there is no
motive for personal gain behind it. I trust God so am not concerned or in fear
about my personal needs. This is the kind of love that took Jesus to the cross.
Besides that, this love cannot exist in a fearful heart. Fear
will keep me from objective care for others because it is focused on me. It involves
the threat of loss, even a concern that if I don’t do something, God will
punish me. This fear keeps me from agape love because it is self-centered.
The fear in this verse is phobos, a Greek word from which
we get phobia. While that word connotes terror,
I think again about light sockets and realize how subtle fear can be. Any “fear”
of being shocked isn’t experienced as a terror even though it governs what I do
around exposed electricity. What about fearing punishment?
It is easier to see in others. For instance, a few people
in my family belong to a cult. They are told that if they do not do as their
organization says, they will be lost to God and have no hope for this life or eternal
life. In fear of that consequence, they do what they are told to do, and even
believe what they are told to believe. Their fear governs their actions and
inaction, yet as they live with it, they have become accustomed to thinking the
way they do about their religion. They are comfortable with it, seemingly unaware
that they are driven by fear rather than love.
Lest I point my fingers and forget that 1 John was
written to Christians, I must think about my own life. Am I afraid that if I don’t
live a certain way, God will “get me” for my neglect? More to the point, do I fear
that I will be punished if I don’t read my Bible today, or if I don’t pray as I
normally pray? Will the Lord slap me around or take away my rewards if I fail
to go to church next week or refuse to go on a church committee? Do I study so I
can help someone else in their quest for God? Or do I study because I am afraid
God will be angry with me if I don’t know all the answers? Do fears like that
drive me to any or all spiritual disciplines and duties rather than being
motivation by God’s love for other people?
Lord, just thinking of those questions is a hint that fear
is sometimes in my life, motivating me rather than love. I’m sometimes afraid
that You will not bless my day if I skip or skimp in prayer that day. I
sometimes do things because I “should” rather than because I care. But my Christian
life is not about me. It is about You and sharing Your love with others. In You,
my relationship with the Father is secure and not dependent on what I do. For
that reason, any fear of being punished is a mark of fleshy living. I can see
that my prayer time is supposed to flow out of a loving concern for others, an
agape love that is willing to sacrifice time and energy for their well-being. I
see how fear is subtle, but it can turns spiritual habits into duty and ritual
instead of making them acts of love. Forgive me.
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