Last night I had bad dreams, not one but two. I woke up with an aching body and a distressed mind. Prayer even before sitting up didn’t bring any peace and joy. My devotional reading doesn’t seem to be related to what is going on in my spirit either. The verse is about waiting for the Second Coming. It says,
For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. . . (Philippians 3:20)I sit here and think how some people get into a jam or have to do something unpleasant, so they hope that Jesus will return and that event will bail them out. When life is rough, I occasionally think like that. I even say aloud, “I just want to go home.” A friend with four rambunctious kids used to say, “Oh for the peace of the grave,” her humorous euphemism for “Jesus, come and get me out of this.”
The author of my devotional guide is more spiritual than either one of us. He says that anticipating Christ’s return is the greatest source of spiritual motivation, accountability, and security. With my escapist attitude, I’m having trouble relating to it.
The motivation part comes from what Jesus said about rewards. I should want to be ready when He comes and anticipate being rewarded when He says, “Well done good and faithful servant. . . . Enter into the joy of your lord” (Matthew 25:23).
I have days where I feel as if I have faithfully served the Lord and enjoy the joy He gives for obedience even while we are still on earth. Those are good days, but today, so far, is not one of them. My mind is scrambled by the dreams, likely because one of them was about a past event that caused much sorrow, and the other was about an inner fear coming to pass. I’m glad that my workshop is not the first thing on today’s agenda. God is providing time where He can help me with these memories and fears, and hopefully give me better things to think about.
The accountability part is at first scarey. I want to see the face of Jesus and feel His welcome home. I rarely think about the judgment. Actually, for Christians, this is not actually scarey, so I should not think that way.
The Bible talks of two judgments; one for us who believe and one for those who have rejected Christ. The rejecters will be judged according to their sin; we will be judged according to all we have done as God’s children. I’m quite aware that some of what I have done will be rewarded, but some will be deemed useless. No one wants to be useless, and that is what scares me.
I’m not sure what the rewards will be though. Scripture indicates that it is more than the “well done” mentioned above. In either case, it is clear that, “each of us shall give account of himself to God” (Romans 14:12). I can see myself standing there speechless.
The security part is that no matter whether I am ready or not, and no matter how much or how little my life has accomplished for Him, Jesus did say, “This is the will of the Father who sent Me, that of all He has given Me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up at the last day” (John 6:39).
This is the blessing. Whether I mess up or bless those who hear me today, whether I struggle with memories or put them behind me, whether my fears come to pass or are just dreams, I belong to Jesus. Nothing can change that. I was given to Him by God the Father, am kept by the power of the Holy Spirit, and will be raised up with Jesus and by Jesus on that last day. How much or how little my life will be valued is not as amazing as the fact that I belong to God.
This is what I can think about. This day is just a day. The important day is yet to come, and that day is not about me any more than this one is. All of it is about Jesus. He is coming. He is bringing rewards and looking forward to seeing His people face to face even more than we are anticipating Him. He knows who we are and He has made us secure, a security that does not depend on what we have done. It never has.
My place in the kingdom of God is solid because of what Jesus has done. When I stand before the judgment seat of Christ, my accounting will not be about me — I’ve nothing to claim. Instead, it will be about Him for He has done everything that I need to bring me into His presence with eternal joy.
1 comment:
Many a time I have felt just like you describe and have arrived at the same conclusions as you! Nothing in my hands I bring, simply to the cross I cling! And the crown we receive we will cast at His feet - as He alone deserves all the glory, honor and power. I am nothing without Him.
Thanks for your post.
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