I know it because I know Him

January 8, 2008

The tests keep coming. Will I trust that God is enough? Last night I arrived in Florida. My husband picked me up at the airport and we drove to our timeshare. We had called ahead and were told that we would have wireless Internet. It turned out to be dial-up, which also requires an account with a service provider such as AOL or Juno. I don’t have such an account.

After expressing some annoyance at the person who said, “Oh, yes, we have wireless,” I proceeded to see what I could do. The first thing is that my wireless adapter kept trying to pick up the account that I was hooked up to in California—then crashing my laptop. After a few unsuccessful attempts to delete that account before the dreaded blue screen appeared, I tried to set up with MSN. Every attempt failed. Even after the modem actually dialed the 1-866 number and I entered all my data (the first three months are free with anytime cancellation), it would not complete the transaction.

Since I’d been up since 4:00 a.m. for my early flight, I went to bed both exhausted and frustrated. As I looked at the ceiling and the back of my eyelids, sleep eluded me. The failures to hook up plus that insane wireless adapter were rattling inside my head. I kept telling myself that it didn’t matter, but obviously it did.

Finally I thought about God being enough. At that, the notion came into my head that He did this for a reason. I’d wanted to post yesterday’s thoughts and He had other ideas. After rereading them, I understood. I either must edit them, or omit them. I don’t know if the hookup will work today, but it no longer matters. He is governing my life and I must trust Him.

Job experienced far greater losses in his life than the use of electronic equipment or an Internet connection. His children died. His livelihood was taken away. He was covered with sores and in great pain. However, this man was able to say, “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him” (Job 13:15).

Job knew God. Even though he complained about his condition and had no idea what was happening or why God allowed it, he had a deep trust that shone though his anguish.

David was able to do the same. He said things like, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me” (Psalm 23:4) and “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof” (Psalm 46:1–3).

These men were ordinary people. They struggled with sin, had friends and enemies, ups and downs. The difference between them and the average person is that they had developed a relationship with God to the point that they knew what He would do, and if not, they knew that He knew what He was doing. They could trust Him to make the right decisions for their lives.

One of my favorite passages in the New Testament is from Romans 8:38-39. Paul had gone through a great many trials, again, far worse than mine. In all of them he could say, “For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Maybe I will find a linkup at a local library. There are five of them within thirty minutes. Maybe I won’t. God knows. If my posts go online today or must wait until we get home, God has His reasons. One thing is certain—He is teaching me every day that though life may not go the way I want or expect, He knows what He is doing and wants me to simply trust Him.