Unless the Lord is in it . . .

Deuteronomy 9; Psalms 92–93; Isaiah 37; Revelation 7

The story was fiction. Two boys were so abused by their father that they went insane. One became a serial killer and the other went mad trying to rescue him. An extreme case.

I contrasted it with Christian parents who raise their children well and yet the children grow up without any interest in God. It is easy to blame ourselves for that. What did I miss? What did I do wrong? And beat up myself because nothing I did made any difference.

 And what does God say about this?

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. (Psalm 127:1)

Unless the Lord is in it, no matter how excellent the parenting, no matter how successful the children are in a worldly sense, all labor is in vain. What counts is not my efforts but the plan and power of God. the Bible makes this plain; I am responsible to love and obey Him, but I cannot change lives. Only God can do that. This He makes clear to His people:

Not because of your righteousness or the uprightness of your heart are you going in to possess their land, but because of the wickedness of these nations the Lord your God is driving them out from before you, and that he may confirm the word that the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob. “Know, therefore, that the Lord your God is not giving you this good land to possess because of your righteousness, for you are a stubborn people. (Deuteronomy 9:5–6)

God has a plan. He will fulfill His plan. I’m a mere tagalong on this mysterious rollercoaster ride and a stubborn one at that. I read His plan from Genesis to Revelation and am in awe. He created us but those first couple in that perfect garden decided they knew better than God. Such arrogance. It sadly became part of our genetic code. Since then, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23) Humanity is a stubborn, ‘I know it all’ entity, yet our loving Creator determined to rescue us from sin and the consequences of sin. The Bible tells the story of that first rebellion and its results, and of God’s solution in sending His Son to die for our sin so we could be set free to live as He intended.

But His plan was not coercion or automatic. To be in on it requires the miracle of a renewed heart, a re-creation that changes stubbornness to humility and willingness to listen to Him and obey Him. No one can do that by themselves. No one can make it happen in others. All the preaching won’t do it — unless God chooses to use the words of a preacher, or the words and lives of parents, or Christian friends, or some deed done in obedience to Him.

Yet the outcome of His plan is also described in this great book, the Bible. Near the end it says:

After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands, and crying out with a loud voice, “Salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb!” And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living creatures, and they fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God, saying, “Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and might be to our God forever and ever! Amen.” Then one of the elders addressed me, saying, “Who are these, clothed in white robes, and from where have they come?” I said to him, “Sir, you know.” And he said to me, “These are the ones coming out of the great tribulation. They have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. “Therefore they are before the throne of God and serve him day and night in his temple; and he who sits on the throne will shelter them with his presence. They shall hunger no more, neither thirst anymore; the sun shall not strike them, nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb in the midst of the throne will be their shepherd, and he will guide them to springs of living water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.” (Revelation 7:9–17)

God’s plan will be fulfilled. It is not fiction. This book speaks to what happens in my life. It hits me where I need to let go of my way, my stubborn independence. It reassures me that God is listening. It backs up every experience, every longing. Through it, I know what to do, what to avoid, what to say and to when to shut up. I also know my stubborn streak is persistent and must be resisted and ignored until that day I see Jesus and my re-creation is complete.

APPLY: Keep on keeping on, praying for those who do not yet know Him, encouraging those who do. I must trust Jesus. My stubbornness stands in His way and accomplishes nothing.

For Christian moms and grandmothers . . .

Today’s devotions are dedicated to all moms and grandmothers, including me, and especially those who are or have been married to unbelievers. God gives a huge boost of encouragement with these verses.

The Apostle Paul has a working relationship with Timothy, a young pastor who is well-spoken of in many passages in the New Testament. One of the most revealing is in Acts:

Paul came also to Derbe and to Lystra. A disciple was there, named Timothy, the son of a Jewish woman who was a believer, but his father was a Greek. (Acts 16:1)

In Christian circles, it seems that Timothy’s parents were ‘unequally yoked’ — that is, his mother believed in Jesus the Messiah, but his father probably didn’t. If he did, this verse very likely would have said so. His mother would have some difficulties in this relationship. In my experience, being the wife of an unsaved husband is not only a challenge, it also adds problems to raising children. In that culture, the men were far more ‘head of the family’ than now, but even now if a wife wants to teach her children about Jesus and the husband is opposed, the home will have some tension. Timothy’s mother would need much wisdom to raise her son in faith. Where did her wisdom come from?

The answer is in Paul’s second letter to Timothy where he notes some history about this young man . . .

I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. (2 Timothy 1:5)  . . . and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. (2 Timothy 3:15)

Timothy’s mother was raised by a Christian mother, his grandmother. She may have been unequally yoked too. The passage does not say, but it does imply that she had faith in Christ and shared gospel truth with her daughter who then shared it with her son. Of particular importance is that they used the Scriptures to teach the boy and from them, he understood God’s plan of salvation.

As Timothy put his faith in Christ for salvation, these women continued to do an excellent job of raising this boy in ‘the nurture and teaching of the Lord’ — as Paul describes in his first letter to Timothy:

The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. (1 Timothy 1:5)

They taught young Timothy to love God and others with a pure heart. The only way that can happen is through the cleansing power of the Lord — given to all who continually confess their sin and rely on Jesus to purify their hearts.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)

This is powerful. Had Timothy been taught that he was a talented young man and constantly told “you can do it” he would not be relying on Jesus but on himself. If his self-esteem was made a priority, he would not be confessing sin and learning to love God with a pure heart. These women knew the importance of keeping short accounts with God, chiefly that it is an expression of faith, of how much we need Him. They stayed true to the gospel message, often not popular with any age, even children.

Not all mothers pass their faith along to their children. Some are given a second chance with their grandchildren. Some women must also work through the issues of being unequally yoked. Lois and Eunice and the outcome in Timothy are God’s encouragement to keep sharing Jesus with family members, even the youngest of them. God can use grandmothers to help little ones become wise for salvation — and grow up to serve God.

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Lord Jesus, on the days when I feel old and useless, I need to remember to persevere. While Your Spirit can work in anyone without me, You have chosen to use Your people to share Your message. This is an awesome privilege. It is important to pay attention to Your guidance and just as important to make sure we give them Your Gospel message and not any other notions that contradict it!

Today’s thankful list . . .

Two amazing young women who clean my whole house in two hours.

A short nap.

Chatting with my brother about a family concern.

The ability to create posters and other helpful design projects.

Crock pot stew — smells heavenly too.

The joy of the Lord which gives me strength.

Strike out or take a walk?

I enjoy watching baseball, a game I understand. While stats and technical conversations are not as interesting as the action, I know the significance of a full count: two strikes and three balls. The next pitch could determine the inning and even the game. It will make the difference whether the batter is on base or put out.

Fortner’s devotional today reminds me of baseball. He gives three ‘strike out’ pitches that parents might toss at their children: neglecting to teach them the Word of God and how to worship; lack of discipline; and setting a bad example.

As I think of these, I wonder how many Christians can say that their parents ‘struck them out’ yet they still wound up on base in the kingdom of God? This is to encourage others who, like me, did not fulfill their role in an ideal way, partly because their own parents did not do it either. Parenting well from a position of being raised without biblical guidelines is not an easy task.

Today’s passage gives Christians several examples of what it means to be filled with the Spirit and living (or going up to bat) for Jesus. Note that several of these verses are directly about roles for husbands and wives. Obedience to these not only bring glory to God, but give children an image of how the church is an obedient ‘helper’ to God. Below are two sentences that speak directly to children, and then another speaks directly to raising children in the power of the Holy Spirit:

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ (this is the first commandment with a promise), ‘that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.’ Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:1–4)

As I read the entire passage, it occurred to me that a dad who loves his wife, and a wife who partners with and respects her husband is more of an example to the children than their church-related activities.

Also, the most important command says not to exasperate or goad them to anger, but raise them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Some versions use ‘educate and train’ or ‘admonish and encourage’ them in the Lord. This last part could mean to raise them as He nurtures us. It could also mean being ‘in the Lord’ and filled with the Holy Spirit. In other words, from the way parents interact with their children, the youngsters are brought to spiritual maturity because they are seeing what God is like. Since most of a child’s ideas about God come from how he sees his parents, this is an important command.

Interestingly, a pastor says he noticed that “the wildest young people came from conservative Christian homes which allowed them no personal choices or freedoms.” While freedom of choice must be gradual and suited to their age and other factors, this enables children to develop personal conviction and faith, rather than second-hand parental guidelines that often will fail them when they are tested. This isn’t in these verses, but a vital part of nurturing our kids.

That is, rather than behavior which causes exasperation, parents are to nurture their children in a supportive manner. They are to “bring them up” or “nourish and protect” regarding “training” which includes the interrelated ideas of education and discipline, just as God does with His children (see Hebrews 12:5–11). It also includes punishment to produce improved behavior.

The second concept is “instruction” and any verbal reprimand or “warning” which is more appropriate for dealing with older children.

I’ve also observed that children need to know and acknowledge their sin, see Jesus and the gospel as sin’s remedy, and to rely on Christ as they encounter life’s challenges. Telling them “Chin up, you can do it” eventually leads to discouragement and frustration. All of us need Jesus.

What if parents do not do this? Does it prevent God from saving a son or daughter of bad parenting or abuse? History and personal experience offer a few examples, not enough to make excuses for poor parenting, but enough to encourage those who find out all these things when it is too late — and their children are adults.

That said, it is never too late to implement the commands of God. Mom and dad can love and respect one another, live for Jesus and set a good example of what God is like. We can apologize to our children for the times we provoked them to anger. We can tell them that God loves them, no matter how often it appeared that we did not. We can also give them freedom to make their own choices. If we don’t agree, we can say so, but we can also respect their decisions and pray for God’s Spirit to guide them and teach them through those decisions.

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Jesus, I know that all is not lost. If the salvation of my unsaved family members depends on my perfect performance, no one can be saved — I will strike out. Instead, salvation depends on You. You can change the heart of the worst of sinners and bring them into a walk with You. The Apostle Paul testifies to that, and so do I. You saved me; You can save anyone.