From Complaining to Cooperation

Having a slight touch of autism means that I work hard to interpret the behavior of others. If someone is complaining, are they in trouble, or crying for help, or thinking they deserve better, or just having a bad day? However, the Word of God has been helping me understand many things, not from a human perspective (we tend to make excuses for everything) but seeing it from God’s perspective. This is what He says about complaining:

Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, (Philippians 2:14–15)

For a Christian, complaining is not a godly behavior but a blemish. It essentially is denying the wisdom of God in the affairs of my life and blatantly saying that He does not know what He is doing, or not doing the right thing, and He does not care about my comfort.

The Word of God is clear: that is not the right attitude to have. It is shutting my eyes and heart to God’s love and wisdom, and not understanding His will. He allows all things that He can use for good, meaning the ‘good’ of being transformed into the image of His Son. If I need correction, He gives it. If I complain about it instead of cooperating with it, I stay the same and miss the point.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. (Romans 8:28–29)

God’s priority is transformation. Complaining misses it. Cooperation brings me into a joyful place of “I get it” and changes my reaction to the stuff that I once belly-ached about. 

This is like the disciple of a parent with a far greater reason behind it than wanting me to learn how to grow up: “For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness.” (Hebrews 12:10)

After seeing God’s purpose for me and how He can use even hardship and tough situations to change my life, then the following verses (and many more) become my focus and my joy:

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly. (Psalm 84:11)
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. (Psalm 23:6)
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? (Romans 8:32)
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psalm 16:11)

As the reading for today says, grumbling is evidence of little faith in the gracious providence of God in all the affairs of my life. Complaining reveals that I do not believe in God’s promises. Complaining dishonors God. It belittles his sovereignty, wisdom and goodness. It also thinks I know more about what is good for me than He does.

In other words, if my faith is strong, I will not grumble. Instead, I will remember that God is always good, not just when life feels good. And if I want to shine as a light in this world, then I must not let complaining obscure God’s gracious, all-controlling providence. Instead, I am learning to be thankful and obey Him in all ways so that His glory shines rather than be marred by my selfish pride. A passion for the goodness and wisdom of God is a passion to grumble no more.

PRAY: Lord, thank You for opening my heart to this reality that You are my Lord. You are good to me and are saving me and transforming me. You actually rejoice over me with gladness as You quiet me by Your love. You even exult over me with loud singing (Zephaniah 3:17). Whatever can I complain about when I am given the wonder of Your goodness and love!

No complaining . . . none . . .

My daughter once said that she finally figured out what is wrong with the world: “Everybody is selfish.” Wise words for a young girl. I already knew how selfish I can be. God is working on that. Also, it is not hard to find more examples.

For instance, in our city, a young man applied for a babysitting job. The parent had already hired someone else and he was not accepted. Instead of continuing to look for work, he filed a human rights complaint that he was being discriminated against based on family status, because he had no children. He earlier filed another complaint of discrimination based on age and gender when another job was cancelled.

This complaint seems like too much focus in the wrong place. Complaining in general usually gives evidence of ‘me, myself and I’ being the center of the universe. Besides that, every time I complain it is rooted in not agreeing with the decisions and actions of the Sovereign God that I claim to worship. Really. If God is sovereign, then all that happens is under His will and permission — so who am I to bellyache about what He is doing? Today’s reading is blunt yet also gives good reason to not gripe about anything:

Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world. (Philippians 2:14–15)

I know a few very shiny people. One of them is the man who heads up brunch in our church. He is not young, walks with a shuffle, has thirteen stents for heart issues, was on dialysis a few months ago for kidney failure (and remarkably recovered) and has other health issues. He goes once a week to Costco to buy food and other brunch supplies, looks for bargains elsewhere (we feed several hundred people each Sunday), is responsible for giving financial reports, has a wife who leads a thriving ministry for single moms and helps her with that, and makes meals for various groups that meet in our building. This man never complains about anything. He actually glows.

I read yesterday a news clip from a celebrity that said, “Try going one whole day without criticizing someone.” It is like the above Scripture verses and prompt me: “Try and go an entire day without complaining or arguing about anything.” This is God’s challenge to me.

It goes deeper. These verses also challenge my faith. Do I really believe in God’s sovereignty? That He knows what He is doing? This is not an exercise in self-control of the mouth. It is a test of what I think about Almighty God. Can I be content and happy, no matter what happens? If I really trust Him, I should never grumble.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Lord Jesus, this had been an emotional week. A near-death situation, constant prayer, a remarkable answer that brought recovery, some personal issues with another person that taught me much, You know all this and the rest of life’s challenges. I’ve no idea what today will bring, but I do believe that You are in charge and that I can trust You. Will that be tested today with negatives that could bring grumbling or disputing? I hope not, yet no matter what, grant me the grace to remember You — and remember to shine so that You are glorified.

Today’s thankful list . . .

God’s goodness.

Made a few goof-ups with my sewing machine and didn’t gripe.

Hearing others give thanks.

Life made easier because of a Google alarm that is easy to set.

My hubby had a good golf game on this day off work.

Angel food cake with peaches and ice cream.

Good growing conditions

We have just come through an unusual heat wave. Yesterday the high was 37C; today it is supposed to be 14C. Our air conditioner ran all day yesterday and this morning my hubby joked that we needed to turn on the heat.

I looked outside. Rain had fallen during the night and everything was fresh and clean — good growing conditions. Too much heat ruins crops. Too much water does also. Growing conditions need to suit what fruit and flowers need. My spiritual life is like that too.

Last night a phone call threw a host of weeds at me. The person who called is a Christian but he was grumbling about everything. No matter the topic and regardless of any praise I offered to the Lord, he found something to criticize. After a time, I handed the phone to my hubby because I felt that if I continued to listen, I would be pulled into poverty of soul. Hubby is better at weeding than I am.

Today, Tozer asks some good questions. He ponders: “What is the special likeness of Christ that He would reproduce in me? What are the features of His life that He calls me to imitate? What pattern would He set before me in my work, my circumstances, my difficulties? What are the inspirations of grace that He would urge me to cultivate and cherish?”

And he points out that plants are never fruitful in thin air. I thought also that we are not fruitful in a field of weeds. Tozer focuses on our roots, quoting Proverbs 12:12 that says “. . . the root of the righteous bears fruit.” Ephesians 5:9 says that “the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true.” Both verses indicate that growing conditions come from righteousness. Our human flesh cannot produce the spiritual fruit that comes from the Holy Spirit through a life yielded to the Lord in faith and obedience.

Today’s text comes from this NT passage. It contrasts weeds with productive fruit producing lives:

“For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.” (Galatians 5:17–24)

The Bible tells me that grumbling is also a work of the flesh and ruins my fruit production and my testimony:

“Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.” (Philippians 2:14–15)

In looking at these verses in light of last night’s conversation, I found this one:

“Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.” (Ephesians 5:11)

Wondering what it means to ‘expose’ unfruitfulness, I checked the Greek word. It means “to state that someone has done wrong, with the implication that there is adequate proof of such wrongdoing — to rebuke, to reproach.”

I tried to rebuke those weeds, but not strongly. Instead of speaking out and using chapter and verse to address the root problem, I discussed the issues that were giving him problems. The real problem was that he had stopped trusting the Lord, which is the root of all complaining and grumbling.

So as always, this brings me back to my own spiritual life and the need to be fruitful, even in a weed patch without sunshine and nourishment. I’m still feeling the effects like a plant tugged from the ground but cannot complain or grumble. Instead, trusting God means learning from this, allowing Him to show me how I can be more like Jesus is such a situation. This will happen again and again until I learn what He wants me to do with someone who finds fault with everything.

^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, this is a challenge. Like the prophets of old, I am not excited about speaking against fleshy behavior. I don’t want to be another target for criticism or to be accused as an annoying person who does not care about the same ‘wrongs’ as those who complain. However, You call me to be fruitful and that list of fruit is so opposite to complaining that at times it seems impossible. And I know that it is — unless I have crucified the flesh and allow the Holy Spirit full control of my heart, mind, emotions, and my mouth!

Issues of the heart

Yesterday I had another echocardiogram. While my heart is not beating properly, I was gratified to see that the beats are nearly even and reasonable slower than I expected. I’ve occasionally said that having a heart that works as it should is not as important as having a pure heart.

God’s people use the term ‘heart’ for more than the physical blood pump in our bodies. Biblically the heart is the center of a person’s thoughts, volition or choices, emotions, and conscience.

It is also the place of sin for those without a saving relationship with God based on faith. No matter how much the people of Israel wanted to obey God, their hearts needed a makeover. They were told:

“And the Lord your God will circumcise your heart and the heart of your offspring, so that you will love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, that you may live.” (Deuteronomy 30:6)

Tozer says obedience is the evidence and definition of our love for Christ. It is also the evidence of being filled with the Holy Spirit. I know that doing what God says is impossible without God’s help, yet if the effort is made with a sincere heart, the Holy Spirit comes to my aid and enables me.

Being able to love God with all my heart and soul is the greatest commandment. As usual, God convicts me about the various ways that I disobey Him. One of them is griping about things I don’t like. He says:

“Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world . . .” (Philippians 2:14–15)

Monday night someone said he wished complaining was not a sin. Another person added that everyone does it. We do. We all fall short. But that is not an excuse. Grumbling reflects an inner attitude. That is, in my heart I doubt that God is in control, sovereign, and forget that the stuff of life is not my enemy but His plan. It also is a blatant statement that I do not love God. I disobey Him every time I complain about anything.

Can I be cheerful about everything? James says I can do better than grumbling:

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” (James 1:2–4)

The bottom line is Christian maturity. I get there by being steadfast in trials that test my faith. To get 100% on those tests, I must consider them with joy, not with grumbling and complaining.

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Jesus, this is a challenging obedience right now. I’ve several things going on that are difficult, at least for me. I cannot see how You can use them to develop steadfast endurance in me. I know that I need the Holy Spirit to do it and that I must be willing to stop whining and start looking at them as You do. They are tools in Your hands to help me become the person You desire. Fill me up — I cannot do this without You.