In Awe of God . . .

Deuteronomy 13–14; Psalms 99–101; Isaiah 41; Revelation 11

Yesterday I prayed that God would give me eyes to see as He sees. I may not do that again for a long time. What I saw in Scripture and in the lives of those who disobey God filled me with strong emotions and by the end of the day, I was totally exhausted. None of what I saw was new, but I saw with a clarity that left me shocked and weak.

This morning, I’m startled by the psalmist’s resolve to be godly and deeply aware that none of what he says is possible without the grace and enablement of Jesus. David may have had extra forces in his favor as a king, yet his attitude and determination show that he is “a man after God’s own heart” and how much Jesus can do in a life totally surrendered to Him.

“I will sing of steadfast love and justice; to you, O Lord, I will make music. I will ponder the way that is blameless. Oh when will you come to me? I will walk with integrity of heart within my house; I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless. I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me. A perverse heart shall be far from me; I will know nothing of evil. Whoever slanders his neighbor secretly I will destroy. Whoever has a haughty look and an arrogant heart I will not endure. I will look with favor on the faithful in the land, that they may dwell with me; he who walks in the way that is blameless shall minister to me. No one who practices deceit shall dwell in my house; no one who utters lies shall continue before my eyes. Morning by morning I will destroy all the wicked in the land, cutting off all the evildoers from the city of the Lord.” (Psalm 101:1–8)

As I pondered this man’s heart for God, the prophet Isaiah gave me the Lord’s great encouragement:

“You are my servant, I have chosen you and not cast you off; fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Behold, all who are incensed against you shall be put to shame and confounded; those who strive against you shall be as nothing and shall perish. You shall seek those who contend with you, but you shall not find them; those who war against you shall be as nothing at all. For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, ‘Fear not, I am the one who helps you.’” (Isaiah 41:9–13)

I hear the Lord speak this to my weakness and fatigue and then He speaks again from Revelation. This I did not expect because so much of this last Bible book describes God’s judgment without much positive offers of help like Isaiah gives for the challenge of godly living in an ungodly world. The passage includes these words:

And the twenty-four elders who sit on their thrones before God fell on their faces and worshiped God, saying, “We give thanks to you, Lord God Almighty, who is and who was, for you have taken your great power and begun to reign. The nations raged, but your wrath came, and the time for the dead to be judged, and for rewarding your servants, the prophets and saints, and those who fear your name, both small and great, and for destroying the destroyers of the earth.” (Revelation 11:16–18)

I’m nothing much in the kingdom of God, an insignificant member of the Body of Christ whose only boast is in the One who shows great mercy to me, saving me and declaring me His child. To hear Him says such things challenges me to holiness. He promises to help me and reminds me that in the end, He is victorious over all evil. Not only that, I will be rewarded, even as wimpy as I am. This is as emotionally overwhelming as the insights of yesterday. I sense His smiling face and shake my head in awe.

APPLY: I cannot make David’s declarations. I do have my own list, much less lofty but for me it is challenging enough that I am glad God promises His strength in my weakness and His power against whatever tries to pull me down in despair. He says I’m not to fear, that He holds my hand. All I can do is praise Him and rejoice.

 

 

That Dratted Green-eyed Monster!

Numbers 29; Psalm 73; Isaiah 21; 2 Peter 2

I’ve often spoke against the ambition common in our culture that seeks “bigger, better, more” as an impossible and foolish value system. It is not self-sustaining. Eventually it hits the wall and those who feel this is important for success must stop and reset. I’m also thinking this pandemic has been part of that reset, unwanted but important.

Yet there is something in the human heart that likes the idea of unlimited success and prosperity. Otherwise there would be no envy or covetousness concerning those more well off and the psalmist would never have written . . .

Truly God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart. But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. (Psalm 73:1–3)

Purity of heart seemed not enough. He saw the success of those without it and wanted that too. He also wanted their seemingly carefree lives, doing as they wished and not caring about God’s opinion. The psalmist wondered if keeping his life clean and enduring spiritual growth through trials was worth it. In verse 16, he says that these thoughts were wearing him out.

I get it. I know people who seem to be successful in what they do but without any concern for purity of heart before God. They are driven by selfish ambition and bigger, better, more. The worst is that when I am around them, I feel the tug of that value system. I’d like to be ‘somebody’ in my efforts rather than a person who is “poor in spirit” and useless without Christ.

The psalmist was helped when he entered the sanctuary of God and considered the eternal outcome of those he envied:

But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end. Truly you set them in slippery places; you make them fall to ruin. How they are destroyed in a moment, swept away utterly by terrors! Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms. (Psalm 73:16–20)

He also realized that his attitude of envy toward these people was harmful to his relationship with God: “When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you.” (Psalm 73:21–22)

Yet he realized the amazing difference between his life and that of those he envied:

Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works. (Psalm 73:23–28)

I’m thinking of those I envy, but not comforted to think about their demise. I’d rather see them become believers in Jesus Christ and live forever. Besides, I’m supposed to love my enemies, not be glad that they will perish.

Instead, God speaks to me about the problem I have with wanting to get into the bigger, better, more race and defeat them and how my attitude of competitiveness comes out by their boasting or their success. This must be confessed and forsaken. God will deal with them as He sees fit, but this is not about them but my sneaky desire to live for my glory. I cannot be a person who impresses my world and at the same time live for the glory of God.

Jesus tells me:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good and sends rain on the just and on the unjust . . . . You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Matthew 5:43–45; 48)

APPLY: God is good to all and my spiritual growth is important to Him. I’m to love and pray for those I envy. They are not persecuting me; but Jesus is loving me. My flesh will fail at ‘perfection’ and my heart cannot muster up the desire to even try, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. As always, He can save me from myself.

Do dreams mean anything?

Last night I dreamed of being in a European country and before being allowed to leave, I had to trace every penny I spent to discern the tax I owed. I was given a device much like a credit card-smart phone combination. It started with the beginning of my vacation and gave alternate choices of where I traveled next or what I purchased. If I remembered incorrectly, it kicked me back until I got it right.

This was a frustrating dream. The tax device came with a thick magazine of instructions that read like most tax forms. Other people tried to help me. By the time I woke up, I’d gone through the process so many times that I wanted to toss it and escape to the border.

This morning’s devotional verses brought a chuckle and make a good point:

“In the path of your judgments, O Lord, we wait for you; your name and remembrance are the desire of our soul. My soul yearns for you in the night; my spirit within me earnestly seeks you. For when your judgments are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world learn righteousness.” (Isaiah 26:8–9)

How much better to yearn for God in the night than to try and escape an almost nightmare of a complicated dream. Not that God is simple, but even without being able to figure Him out, I can still worship Him rather than wanting to pitch any situation I’m in, dreaming or awake, and running away from it.

Sometimes dreams come from puzzles and situations in life. Sometimes, like my father used to say, they come from eating too much pizza! I rarely try to figure out the meaning of my dreams. If they are important, God seems to make that clear. Most of them are silly nonsense and I often wake up laughing aloud.

As for this dream, there is a purpose in God giving me these verses about seeking Him in the night. Some of the psalmists also write of yearning for God in the night. Is the person sleeping or awake? I’ve had a few dreams where God was at work and startled me awake, but most of my encounters with Him are when I am praying and His presence becomes obvious and precious. These are few. These verses heighten my desire to seek Him.

Isaiah says that when God’s judgments are present, then people learn His righteousness. This suggests a rebuke, a correction. It is like God to do that in private, not to make my follies known publicly but to correct and instruct me when I am alone. Nighttime for me is the best time; no distractions and no one else listening.

I didn’t get much from that dream about the complexity of figuring out what I owed in taxes except that I realize how frustrated I am of my complex brain. It is always set on ‘fast and furious’ and makes me tired. God is telling me that I need to focus on Him and more directly seek Him when life comes at me like a freight train. If I must review what I have done, where I’ve spent my resources, far better to do it with His hand holding mine — in the night when He has my full attention. Then I will not feel like running away but be able to slow down and see the righteousness that He is teaching me.

^^^^^^^^^^

Jesus, faith in You is never dull. Yet thoughts of You always slow my crazy brain, give me pause, help me rest. If nothing else, dreams like that one last night, and Scripture passages like this one in the morning show me that waiting for You and seeking You are far more profitable than the frantic and frustrating exercise of trying to figure out life’s challenges without You!