Strength is okay, but I don’t like being weak . . .

The events of our lives over the past few weeks are overwhelming. They have made my prayer list longer than it has ever been, and even though I trust God who is sovereign, weakness and helplessness are a daily companion. There is nothing that I can do to alleviate any of these situations. God alone is wise and powerful, so in weakness I am praying.

Today’s topic is strength in weakness. For the Apostle Paul, it was a “thorn in the flesh” which is not revealed except to say God allowed it to keep him from becoming conceited by the deep revelations God had given him. It was obviously a nasty thing and this godly man asked three times for its removal, but that didn’t happen. Instead, God said to him:

 “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Paul replied: Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Some suspect this weakness was about his propensity to sin, others figure it was a health issue. However, it also could have been the solemn realization that “in my flesh I can do nothing.” He had been in a position of authority with power, a Pharisee with considerable influence. Yet he found himself incapable of doing anything apart from humble dependence on Christ. In another passage, he described some of his strengths and what he eventually realized about them:

“For we are the circumcision, who worship by the Spirit of God and glory in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in the flesh — though I myself have reason for confidence in the flesh also. If anyone else thinks he has reason for confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness under the law, blameless. But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith —” (Philippians 3:3–9)

Counting as rubbish all that we might put our confidence in is no small matter. It could be education, position, personality, achievements, reputation, all sorts of skills and abilities. Yet none of those things can do what God can do. God wants His people to rely on Him fully, Him only. There is nothing I can do, nothing I can say, even nothing I can imagine that will bring eternal fruit or even be a blessing to others unless it is done in faith and in full reliance upon Jesus Christ. Nothing.

This is the weakness. It isn’t about being a cripple, or physically incapable. It isn’t about losing your voice, or the constant battle with temptation. It is about fully realizing that I am only a glove; it is the Hand that does it all.

Even then, the Hand, the Lord Jesus Christ also lived and died that way — in weakness. He was fully God but also fully human:

“Though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” (Philippians 2:6–8)

Jesus is God, yet He took on human flesh and relied on the Father the same way I am to rely on Him — in utter weakness:

“For he was crucified in weakness, but lives by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but in dealing with you we will live with him by the power of God.” (2 Corinthians 13:4)

Paul said that he wanted to “be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith” and his reason for saying it: “that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death . . . ” (Philippians 3:9–10) God revealed that the power of God only comes through weakness, the weakness of His Son and the weakness of His beloved followers, and Paul understood.

^^^^^^^^

Again, Lord Jesus, I do not like the feeling of weakness, but realize that asking You to remove it would be asking You to glorify me instead of bringing glory to You. I also realize that many, even many Christians, often react negatively when someone ‘gladly boasts’ in their weaknesses. They don’t want to go there. I try to imagine what this was like for You. In the end, even Your disciples misunderstood what You were doing and why. Perhaps that is the biggest reason for disliking weakness; it is a lonely place.

Death needed for Light to shine

Echoing what the devotional says today, sin is a sadly common fact of life. No believer in the Bible bragged about his goodness because all of them struggled with sin. It is as Chinese martyr Watchman Nee said — being a Christian is like having two dogs fighting inside. We have two natures within us. One is the new person — righteous because of being united to Jesus Christ. The other is our flesh, the old nature that has a love/hate relationship with sin and both wants to do it, yet longs for freedom from it. However, the flesh is totally unable to do anything against sin. It may try to keep the law of God, but cannot. It is as Paul said:

“For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.” (Romans 7:14–20)

Every Christian knows this battle, but not everyone realizes our war is between flesh and sin, law-keeping and failure. My spiritual victories cannot be won that way. As in salvation, I cannot depend on my flesh-efforts but on the power and sustaining grace of God. The flesh is feeble and weak, yet needs to go one step farther because the only answer is complete deadness. Instead of trying harder, the flesh must yield to death and cease from interfering with the grace that not only saves but sanctifies.

God says, “Let light shine out of darkness.” He has shone in my heart to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But I have this treasure in a jar of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to me. (2 Corinthians 4:6–7)

How can it be? A jar of clay in Bible times was used to transport water, not light. The only way light could be seen through the walls of that jar would be if it were broken, full of holes, generally useless in the ordinary duties of being a jar. Only then can light shine through it.

This fits with what God told Paul. He said His grace was made perfect in weakness. If I am like a cracked and hole-filled jar, I would feel weak, even helpless — and isn’t this what God wants? The jar, the old nature, is the only thing visible to others if it remains unbroken. Only when it is weak and useless for all other purposes, can the light of Jesus Christ shine through to those outside.

^^^^^^^

Jesus, You know how I hate to feel weak. You know that I need to let Your life shine through me and the only way that will happen is when I am broken, yielded, weak, unfit for anything else but bearing Your image. You lived that way, totally relying on the Father, full of grace and truth. I realize that the problem isn’t in being like You, but in resisting Your work in me to so I can let Your light shine. My flesh nature is too alive, too greedy, too hungry for power and control. Help me to stop feeding it and allow it to shrivel and die.

Condemnation?

Yesterday, a person accused me that something I did was wrong. I’d not been convicted that it was, so was totally surprised and had nothing to say. The devil, a liar and accuser of God’s people added a few more hits and I began to feel totally condemned. After calming down, I realized this was a spiritual battle, one of Satan’s attempts to provoke me to self-protection and stop me from praying.

My enemy is not flesh and blood, so I prayed for that person and the misunderstanding. I also asked God to show me if there was something in me that needed to be brought before Him in confession and repentance. The pressure eased up and sleep came easy.

However, I woke around 3:30 a.m. with that heavy sense of internal pain again, feeling as if I’d been wounded. With my hubby’s wise help and the enlightening of the Holy Spirit, we began to understand more fully what was going on in my reaction. The Lord also showed us what was driving the person who did this. Peace.

This morning, I was still not sure if I had been in the wrong. The thoughts in my head were vague. God reminded me that conviction from the Holy Spirit is clear. I always know what He is telling me. However, the enemy’s accusations are usually fuzzy yet emotionally painful. I asked God for clarity and He answered in the first verse of today’s devotions: “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

This was a big hug. God assures me that even when I do wrong, it is forgiven. Was I wrong? Not if I was following the lead of the Holy Spirit. Was I doing that? I think so. Yes, I know I was. While our actions can never be a hundred percent free from personal desires and hopes, this time what I did was an act of love rather than selfishly motivated.

The passage goes on:

“For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.” (Romans 8:1–5)

More hugs from the Lord in those verses. Even though He might possibly have something else in mind to later reveal, right now He knows what I need to hear. What a loving God!

The rest of the reading takes me to the end of Romans 8. After verses 28-29 that tell me God will use all things including this ‘thing’ to transform me into the image of His Son, He says this:

“What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, ‘For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.’ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:31–39)

^^^^^^^

Jesus, dear Jesus, because of You, I am more than a conqueror over what happens to me. This event will build my spiritual life, not destroy it. I need to abide in You and trust You. Because of You, no one can get away with a false accusation. Any sins I have committed You have also covered. There is no condemnation against me and nothing or no one can separate me from the love of God.