To Live is Christ — pouring out my heart

It is said that many people, particularly women, sort out thoughts much better when they verbalize them. I’m not sure of the reasons for this, but it might be part of why women generally need to say many more words than men.

For me, with many attention-deficit symptoms, speaking what I am thinking helps me focus, and what comes out sometimes amazes me. This week, the elder in charge of Christian education in our church asked if I would teach again in the fall. As I explained to him what I was planning, I was surprised. My mouth articulated my plan much clearer than what I had figured out in my mind.

It is the same with writing. When I read a piece out loud, the parts that need editing and revision are much more clearly defined. Perhaps it is the combination of seeing and hearing that gives it a one-two punch.

Reading the Word of God aloud has a similar effect. If I read silently, my mind can wander. My eyes see the words but my thoughts drift elsewhere. Focus and impact increase when I read it aloud.

Prayer is like that too. I often go for a long walk and take my prayer list with me. Praying out loud might result in a neighbor calling “the little men in the white coats” so I mouth the words, even whisper, instead. Not only does this keep me on track, it also helps me do what today’s devotional verse says.

Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah (Psalm 62:8)

Pouring out my heart almost demands speaking aloud, at least for me. With my easily distracted and scatted mind, the words have to be said. Even then, they are often jumbled and my thoughts seem to jump all over the place. Staying on topic is a problem, but the bigger problem is that my heart seems so full of so many things, that when I pour it out, the flow is anything but a logical order.

After a verbal outpouring, those who do it often say they feel much better. That suggests that this kind of prayer is therapeutic. I think that is part of why we do it. God wants His people to enjoy life and feeling good is okay. But prayer is more than that. It is communication with our Creator and Redeemer. It is telling Him our joys and sorrows and experiencing His presence. It is asking Him to do what is best in our lives and the lives of others.

Sometimes when I pour out my heart, I feel like I am dumping on God. He welcomes that because it is an expression of trusting Him at all times. However, He also wants me to be silent while I pray as while. It is during these silences that He speaks. His Word comes into my mind and I know that I am not just yakking into the air. This is amazing.

Prayer is a mystery in some ways also. How can God listen to all who pray? There could be millions of voices lifted to Him at any given time. And why should God want to talk with me? I am nothing. Yet He says to come, to ask for all things, and even to pour out my heart.