Home sweet home

Every now and then I will be alone and say aloud, “I want to go home.” Every time I say it I think first of my childhood home, because that is the human side of those words, but I know that I am not longing for that place.

This morning I read Hebrews 11:16. It describes my almost impossible to describe longing. “But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.”

When I say these words, sometimes the stress of life is getting me down. Or I might be lonely. Or I might be fine, just longing to see Jesus. My devotional reading describes me even as the author describes the people of God that this verse is about, the Old Testament saints who loved the Lord and looked to Him for something more. (I’ve edited this a bit.)

In desiring a better country these ancient pilgrims wanted something heavenly, something that tasted of God . . . something which came from heaven and led to heaven, which gave (them) heavenly feelings, heavenly sensations, heavenly delights, and heavenly joy. (They wanted their hearts) purified from the love of sin, carnality, and worldliness by having something sweeter to taste, better to love, and more holy to enjoy.

Yes, sometimes I am just tired of being here, tired of the bad news in the headlines, tired of praying for people who couldn’t care less if anyone did, and tired of the continual battles in my own heart against selfishness and the lies of Satan.

God knows all these things. Sometimes He simply drops by in some special way to assure my heart that He knows and He cares. I presented a workshop at a writer’s conference yesterday and felt that I could have done much better. God sent one of the people who attended to tell me she is not a writer and wondered why she was there, but my workshop was the answer, the reason God had her at the conference. My devotional today goes on to say . . .

It is these heavenly visitations, droppings in the favor, goodness and mercy of God, which keep the soul alive in its many deaths, sweeten it amidst its many bitters, hold it up amidst its many sinkings, and keep it from being drowned while conflicting with many waters.

How I agree. God understands that even little things can feel like a sinking ship because none of us are very good at evaluating our own performance. He knows when we need a little of His applause to get us back on track. Yet when He makes living here a bit sweeter, that longing for a heavenly country remains. I still desire home, to be with Him all the time. Why is that?

A carnal mind has no taste for heavenly things, no sweet delight in the word of God; no delight in the Lord Jesus revealing Himself in the word; no delight in closet duties, secret meditation, searching the Scriptures, communion with God, or even in the company of God’s dear family. There must be a heavenly element in the soul to understand, realize, enjoy and delight in heavenly things. The Holy Ghost must work in us a new heart, a new nature, capable of understanding, enjoying, and delighting in heavenly realities . . . they desired, therefore, a better country, that is a heavenly, a city which hath foundations, whose Builder and Maker is God.

I long for home because He lives in my heart and somehow imparts in me a taste, a hunger, a longing for more. He fully knows what that heavenly home is like and deeply desires that I know it also. He longs for me to be with Him in that perfect place, so I’m certain that this desire I feel to go home is actually some of His desire rubbing off.