Digging up the carrot seeds

The people in my class yesterday said their week was uneventful, life was ordinary. My material was about the difference Jesus makes in our lives because we are saved by grace, not by our own effort. I wanted them to be in awe over the amazing fact that God saves us apart from our efforts. Most of them seemed rather out of it, as if the material came in from left field.

At that, I began to question my method and material. What did I do wrong? How could I improve? Sometime during my questioning, I lost my own awe over the grace of God.

As I reflect and ask God to show me what is going on, several things come to mind. First there is my regular reading. Acts 5 tells how the religious leaders were having fits about the teaching of the disciples. “ . . . they were furious and wanted to put them to death. But a Pharisee named Gamaliel, a teacher of the law, who was honored by all the people, stood up in the Sanhedrin and ordered that the men be put outside for a little while. Then he addressed them: ‘Men of Israel, consider carefully what you intend to do to these men. . . .’”

Gamaliel reminded them of previous revolutionists who eventually came to nothing. Then he added, “Therefore, in the present case I advise you: Leave these men alone! Let them go! For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God.”

The principle here is that God does what He wants, regardless of human efforts to start something or stop it. He is sovereign. My efforts will fail. I need to keep trusting in His ability to work. If He gives me material to teach, I need to trust Him to use it as He wishes.

Then I think of John 3 where Jesus describes the working of the Holy Spirit like the wind. No one can tell where it comes from or where it is going. I don’t have any idea what God is doing in the hearts of the women in my class. Sometimes they share, and sometimes I can see the “lights come on” in their countenance, but otherwise it is for God to do and know, not me.

The other thing I notice when I’m unsure if God is using me it that I have to watch where I go to find out. If He gives me something to say and I say it, I’m supposed to leave the results to Him, not be like the little boy who planted carrots then kept digging up the seeds to see if they were growing.

Just when I thought I was trusting Him, He shows me one more area that I’m not.