I should not need a deadline. . .

There are people who seem to be angry all the time. It sets wrinkles in their brow, gives them ulcers and a reputation; “Don’t cross her; she will never forget it.”

I used to joke that I’ve not enough energy to hold grudges. That may be true, but it is also a God-given grace. What usually melts me is realizing how much I’ve been forgiven. How can I stay angry with someone who has done far less than I have?

But, sinful creature that I am, I can be picky about stuff. My poor husband has been the brunt of most of it. Nagging might be a wife-husband thing, but I’ve done it and fought it for most of our marriage. No matter how hard I tried, or how often I took it to the Lord, that cycle of repent-repeat kept going on and on, until last month. It stopped the day he told me that the doctor said he has cancer.

He noticed the change in me, I’m sure. Others were treating him with special consideration and I remarked that it should not take something like this deadline on life to make us treat people the way God tells us to. He smiled, “No, it should not.”

Odd, God’s commands to proper behavior are often linked to a similar deadline, like the Second Coming, or the end of the world. In Romans 13, He tells us to "love one another" then says to do it, “knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep; for now our salvation is nearer than when we first believed. The night is far spent, the day is at hand. Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts” (Romans 13:11-14, NKJV).

Love one another because our salvation is nearer now . . . time is passing. We are getting older. Our time to step into eternity is closer. Quit living in the flesh—and fleshy living means all selfishness. Even though this passage illustrates with extremes, the flesh is also behind grudges, fault-finding, complaining, and a critical spirit. Ouch.

Realizing that this life is not open-ended is a good strategy for putting a stop to dark and foolish revelry, but also stopping those petty things that irritate serenity. If God accomplishes nothing else through this cancer thing, I’m thankful for the wake-up call to a better attitude, and really sorry for being so picky for so long. And this is a very public apology.